Letting Go vs. Holding On

When is it appropriate to “let go” someone vs. to “hold on” to someone?

Have you ever felt like someone is your Twin or could be your Twin but there are also things about them that make you wonder?

Have you ever had a situation where you knew the right thing to do but you didn’t do the right thing out of loyalty to that person, or perhaps out of the addiction you have to that person?

You may have spent your childhood with that person or a big part of your adult life, and you can’t imagine them not being there anymore. But the pain you feel because of the choices they make, is almost unbearable. So when do you cut the line, draw the line, shift the line or do whatever you have to with “this line” and send them on their way so you don’t have to compromise your Self anymore?

A few years ago I had let a best friend of 12 years go because what I found out about her was so contradictory to my own beliefs and my own values, that she became the “test” for me to see if I would sell out or not. I struggled with the reality of judging her. I didn't want to judge her for the choices she made, and at the same time I wasn't willing to turn my head away from those parts that would jeopardize my own integrity. I let her go and today, more than 4 years later, I have no regrets about it. In fact, after our parting other people of much higher quality of character started to enter my life and life took a turn for the better for me.

A couple of years later I tried to remember the blessings that came out of me sticking up for what is right and I tried to have a similar talk with a friend and it didn't go over too well. I found myself in a similar boat and I had to make the same decision once again. And it was harder this time, as most tests are, even though it “shouldn’t” be. I struggled to “cut loose” and “let go” but I didn't want to “hold on” to the friendship either – because I overall realized that we had already lost whatever we had to hold on to for dear life.

I have a saying and belief that whatever is mine cannot be taken away from me. So if it’s mine and I let it go, it will come back to me tenfold. If it doesn’t come back it was never mine to begin with. Why is it so hard to break other people’s hearts just so we can stay in integrity with our own karma and life journey?

I did let go and today, more than 2 years later I see how it was the absolutely best thing, once again, for all parties involved. It took me a long time to get over hurting this person's feelings. Hard at first, heart-breaking even, but time is a great healer and new people of even higher integrity started to appear.

A year later I was given the opportunity again, just to test myself one more time, the entire "sifting process" took less than a month. The healing process took less than a day. It's the way lessons work. The first time is hard, the second time is even harder. However, if we put our integrity (or God) at the top of our priority list, suddenly you realize that the third time is easy. And then suddenly you realize that you have a strength about your character that serves as a repellent and new people without integrity won't even come into your energetic field. And better yet, those that do come into your field because they want to change and they're looking to get nourishment from you. Now THAT is the true blessing.