Calling My Beloved Twin Soul

THIS BLOG HAS MOVED

2009-07-12T07:54:00.000-07:00

Please visit me at http://blueprint-for-love.blogspot.com for new and exciting posts.

Are You Ready For True Love?

2009-07-07T09:59:00.000-07:00

"No one is ready for a thing until he believes he can acquire it. The state of mind must be belief, not mere hope or wish." Napoleon Hill

And I am going to peel the layers back a little more and take it a step deeper. If you know something beyond a doubt in your mind, belief is no longer needed...and is overcome by a knowingness that can only be described as divine. It's like tapping into the superconscious computer system of our divine headquarters. You know it with every fiber, molecule and atom of your Being.

I have surpassed the belief that my Beloved is searching for me as much as I am searching for you, I KNOW it. There is a deep knowledge that what is mine cannot be taken away from me, and what is yours cannot be taken away from you either. Thus I am at peace knowing that it is not a matter of "if" he will find me, it is only a matter of time until he is here in his physical appearance. Or perhaps he's already here and we simply haven't stepped up to the plate as of yet...

If you are ready then you are ready for the Blueprint for Love™, a process that not only has the power to reshape the past but has undoubtedly the ability to bring home your true love. Visit http://www.blueprint-for-love.com or simply sign up via my Blog. I look forward to helping you on your journey.

2009-07-04T10:53:00.001-07:00

Great article: The 7 Highly Effective Habits of Chronically SINGLE Women,
http://ping.fm/eI9uN

When You Want to Hate...But You Just Can't...

2009-05-26T19:56:00.000-07:00

Have you ever gone through such an ordeal by the hand of another that the "logical" next step would be to simply hate them? Perhaps you even want to take revenge on them and "show them" how it feels to hurt equally as much?

Taking revenge or hating someone has yet to bring peace or love back into your life or anyone else's for that matter...

There was a man in my life, you know who you are, who disguised himself as the love of my life and boy did it look just like that! And yet in the end he took off his sheep's clothing and turned out to be a merciless monster. I have walked through hell many times in my life time, and yet this was like no other hell. This was different because he created the garden of Eden for us but when he removed the veil it turned out to be pure hell.

How can anyone be so cruel, so relentless and wanting to hurt someone so badly?

And how is it that after all this I still can't find an inkling of hate for this person?

All I'm finding is compassion and empathy and as crazy as it may sound, I still find myself missing the good times that we did have, and we had lots of those. I miss our laughter, our giddy times, our communications, our connection most of all.

So while I am moving on in life, picking myself up by the bootstraps and dusting off my knees and extending my gratitude to the Universe for allowing me to feel and learn and grow so much, I can only hope that he will find peace in the very hell he created.

Remember that love does not come to you from your horizon, love comes from within you and spreads out beyond your horizon.

Love starts with you - right now!

The Best Matching System Yet - I Promise

2009-05-19T16:07:00.000-07:00

I have some exciting news to share with you. I discovered a relationship matching tool that actually WORKS. No kidding around. I was skeptical myself at first and thought what you're probably thinking this very second.

"Please, NOT another profiling system with an endless series of questions to answer"
The difference is MatchMatrix DOES NOT search out relationship compatibility based on common interests. It uses a radical approach that has been in development for the last 30 years. NOW, it's ready to be released and you can be among the first to experience the benefits.
It was just yesterday that my friend Frank Seifert, founder of MatchMatrix, took me through the surprisingly simple steps.

Actually, it's just one step, takes 60 seconds at the most. You can see for yourself because Frank has arranged for you to receive the same as I... at NO COST to you btw. This is a free gift that will provide you insight into why your past or present relationships didn't or currently aren't working.

It's a new approach to an age old problem and I highly recommend you give it a shot. No strings attached whatsoever. At the very least you walk away with a better understanding of the type of people you can build a happy and long-lasting relationship with.

You know that click that goes off in your head when something complicated becomes clear. This is how I felt after learning the MatchMatrix system.

You be the judge, try it for yourself by visiting...
http://www.matchmatrix.com/freereport/?af=12626

All the best,

Chaszey

P.S. I believe in the MatchMatrix system and fully intend to use it in my every day life. I would love to hear what your thoughts are after you learn more about it.

Today's Messages about Faith and Passion

2009-05-06T10:40:00.000-07:00

As I was having a telephone conversation with a friend this morning we both realized that we were powerful and successful women and yet, both in our 40s, we too are at a place in life where we ask ourselves "what's next?" It's not that we're bored, on the contrary, we have so many talents, dreams and capabilities that we feel flooded with ideas that we want to bring to the world. The question is, where to start?

Do you ever feel like you have so much to offer, that if each of your ideas were a tree that you could plant an entire forest in no time?

After I hung up the phone I played with my "cards" and asked the "other side" to help with some direction. Here is what I picked:

"Expect a Miracle. Have faith that your prayers have been heard and are being answered. Faith is the light that illuminates your pathway. Without faith, the future looks very frightening. That's why it's essential for you to take whatever steps are necessary to keep your mind and heart filled with faith. Please don't give up hope on yourself or other people. Keep the candle of faith burning within your soul, as that one small inkling of hope can eradicate the darkness of despair. Be the light that eliminates someone else's gloomy hopelessness as well. For as you make others stronger, it strengthens not only yourself but the entire world."

The second message I received was about passion:

"Trust and follow your renewed passion in your life and career. Playing it safe can lead to staleness and depression. You've asked for more happiness and definite direction. I've lit the flame of passion in your heart to lead and guide you. It's safe for you to take risks and follow your heart's desire. Ask me to be your partner along your path of passion, to guide and nurture you. When you feel a strong knowingness, alongside a burning passion, pay attention, as this is my way of giving you information about your next step."

I hope this encourages you to have faith and back up this faith by the steps you take. After all, faith without deeds is dead. And remember that love doesn't come to you from your horizon, but spreads out from within you to the horizons and far beyond!

Our Journey called Life

2009-05-05T12:29:00.000-07:00

I had walked this path so many times, and have learned so much along the way, yet never was I open to receiving as many blessings as I did this last time I walked this path. Nature is one of my greatest teachers, always has been, and I hope that you can grow and feeling blessings through my eyes and my sharing.

I parked my car where I always park it, along Indian Valley, where I realized lesson 1: whatever grounds I'm about to walk on is indeed filled with wisdom, age old sage energy and sacredness.

This time, however, my car was the only one there; it must have been because it was raining; when I realized lesson 2: when it's "ugly" outside people don't want to come out.

I got out of the car and stepped onto the gravel road when the most amazing smells hit my nose and my entire being. I was overwhelmed with smells of rain, various kinds of trees, horses, flowers, and all kinds of other smells, when I realized lesson 3: when it gets "ugly" is when our senses are especially receptive to our surroundings (provided we have the courage to open our eyes and are willing to "get wet").

Feeling especially blessed being on my hike alone and in solitude I realized lesson 4: it's good to be out in solitude and alone to soak in all Mother Nature has to offer.

As I came up to the first fork in the road I realized that I had a choice to take the first right or I could walk on a little and take the second right. Both paths eventually connected and looped around to come down to the main path where I was standing. The major difference was that the first path would go up a very steep hill that most people avoid. Taking the second path up the hill would offer me a longer trip up hill but not even remotely as steep. However, because the two paths connect I would then have to come down this very steep hill. I had a choice to make, which is when I learned lesson 5: all paths in life are just detours and will eventually lead us back to our main path. And lesson 6 was right around the corner: if we knew how steep our detour paths were, would we still take them? Which one would I take, the steep one or the longer but less steep one?

I decided to take the steep one. I wanted to feel my heart pump today and I knew that if there was anyone else out today in this rain, I would certainly not encounter anyone on this steep path. I longed for solitude!

The path is steep and windy and my heart is pumping and my lungs are burning. Every bend leaves hope to be the last turn before the path has got to flatten out (please!). And so I learned lesson 7: just because your path seems too steep, too burdensome, too lonely, and getting you out of breath too fast, doesn't mean you should stop and turn around when the going gets tough. Hang in there, even if the path around the bend doesn't flatten out right away.

At one point the path had gotten so steep that too much rain had carried away good chunks of the road and it was easy to visualize how gushing water took loads of dirt with it downhill. And I learned lesson 8: your path can be forever marked with ridges by the gunk that comes washing down towards us. Don't give up, keep going.

Finally I arrive at the top of the ridge where the path flattens out and I learn lesson 9: it's good to feel my body and heart pumping and my being so alive, I made it to the top! It's time for just a little reflection.

I look around and suddenly see the most amazing gifts. Lesson 10: When the going gets tough don't stop; stop when you've arrived at the top, to take a breather, to take inventory, to enjoy your success!

Lesson 11 was here as well: what gorgeous views when you've hiked a mountain that took your breath away. What beautiful life up here that remains untouched and yet Mother Nature feverishly works with all she has to bring balance to her backyard.

I continue walking on level ground surely expecting the path to go downhill soon. But oh not so fast - another hill ahead of me. And I learn lesson 12: just when you think you've made it to the top and it surely must get easier now is when life throws you one last hike up hill. Go for it, don't get frustrated.

As I continue walking up the hill I count my blessings and look forward to making my final ascent. And when I get there the path narrows and suddenly a puddle covers the entire path. And I learn lesson 13: Just because you're on the top doesn't mean it's all smooth sailing. You have a choice to walk through puddles, go around them or hop over them (or you could return down the hill because you're too scared to get dirty).

Finally arriving at the top I find a post with a sign that says: "Restoration Area - Please keep out." And I realize lesson 14: When you're exhausted do give yourself rest and "keep out" from areas in your soul that need rejuvenating, restoration and rest. Do not force yourself to do anything that doesn't feel right. Give yourself a chance to grow.

On my path down the mountain the path becomes windy and narrow with many rocks, bolders and trees roots blocking a smooth path. And I learn lesson 15: Just because you think you're on an easier path now doesn't mean you don't have to watch where you're going. Road blocks and obstacles will accompany going both up and down hill.

I stop next to a beautiful Manzanita tree and realize that it's skin was peeling and I learn lesson 16: Not only snakes shed their skin, even trees shed their skin; so what makes me think that I don't need to transform and shed "old skin" too?

I come around a bend and realize that a small bridge had been built to get over the creek that flows underneath it. And I learn lesson 17: Even if you're on an easy path sometimes your path gets blocked by another force wanting to block your downward road. Build a bridge and continue on your own path, don't get side tracked and don't let yourself get turned around or pushed off your path.

A little ways down I realize that park rangers had come in to fix a section of the path by inserting small tree trunks every few yards to keep the path from flooding downhill during a storm. They filled the section between the trunks with new dirty that now was wet and heavy from the rain. As I walked over the dirt the mud stuck to my shoes making it very difficult to walk because my feet became so heavy. Not only was the mud full of clay, but it was also slippery (see the clay on my shoes in the picture?). And I learned lesson 18: Just because someone rebuilds a path to make it easier doesn't mean it will be easier for you to walk your path. Circumstances (in this case the rain) may make it more difficult, and that's okay. Keep on walking!

I come around the next turn and realize that the most beautiful little creek was directly crossing the path. And I learned lesson 19: I could walk through the water and get my feet wet, I could try to hop over the stones or take a huge leap trying to avoid the water. Or I could do what I opted to do; bend down and stick my hand in the water while saying a prayer for the water to carry my unconditional love to the rest of the planet. Surely all rivers flow into the sea and then back to the mountain tops, and so my prayer would certainly affect all beings. So when you're feeling down, say a prayer for others and ask it to be returned to you a thousand fold. It felt blissful to feel the water rush around my fingers - what joy!

And just as I hop over the rocks I hear an intense buzzing sound up above me. Looking up I see a hole inside a tree about 5 yards above me, and hundreds of buzzing yellow jackets surrounding the hole. And I learned lesson 20: Just because I'm the only human being in the forest doesn't mean life isn't everwhere - we just tend to miss it and think we're the only ones when we keep ourselves from enjoying all life everywhere.

I say a prayer of gratitude for the buzzing sound they make and for getting my attention in this way and walk on.

As I walk down the hill I see all kinds of gifts, dead trees that broke off during a storm that now seem to grow branches and leafs again. Broken down trunks that are full of fungus featuring all kinds of different colors and serving as food for insects and life everywhere. Simply beautiful. And I learn lesson 21: Art doesn't have to be hung in my living room as a permanent fixture, nature features art that is most colorful, moving and passing, inspiring and yet never dull or boring.

And even further down I see these two trees that seem to lean to the side at similar angles. It's as if they're a couple and they hold each other's space by pointing in the right direction while staying close. And I learn lesson 22: it's okay not to stand erect at all times, someone will lean with you when you don't have the strength to stand up straight.

Moving down the path even more I come to a part of the path where the path becomes about one foot wide, and on top comes this massive tree root and right behind it is this newly "planted" pile of horse manure and I learn lesson 23: not only can your path feel tight so you need to lift up your feet to move forward, but someone may put some "shit" in your path that you don't like. Hop across and move on anyway.

And just when I feel like life's lesson must come to an end for this journey Life suprises me with the most peculiar tree trunk I had seen. It was as if the tree had been blasted with bullets and the trunk seemed to have these large "holes." And I learned lesson 24: even trees get wounds and they too know how to heal themselves, slowly and over time. Don't rush your healing process, allow yourself to heal and move on, trusting that Mother Nature knows what she is doing.

As I come back to the main trail I start heading back towards my car when I am blessed with even more lessons. I see footsteps of various kinds. First I see fresh horse shoes, then I see a dog's paw print, then I see a print from a bicycle tire and of course hiking shoes. And I learn another lesson, 25: I don't live on this planet alone and there are many creature walking my path with me...

Almost at the end of my path I see some commotion ahead of me and what looks like a bunch of birds turn out to be three squirrels having fun chasing each other and having fun eating nuts. I was sure that they would run up the tree as soon as I approached but life gave me an opportunity to be less than 3 yards away from them and I learned my final lesson 26: have fun, chase each other and let yourself be chased once in a while, eat good and let others get close to you, no matter how different they are than you...

With much love for your journeys all wonderful souls out there!

Note: The pictures on this post are from my actual hike taken that day.

Half Dead - Half Alive

2009-05-05T12:17:00.000-07:00

About 9 months ago I met someone who had asked all his life for bliss and happiness. Having come to close to half a century old he had almost given up to ever finding bliss and happiness and had started to settle in to the mediocre, predictable life he had created. Suddenly he realized that he was given everything needed to live a blissful and happy life and at first tended to it like any farmer would tend to the fragile seeds he had just planted.

After a few months, however, he realized that he may not have the strength to continue taking care of his new crop. Living on bare and non-producing land had left him starving for love, bliss and happiness all his life, but suddenly having to tend to the protection of his newly planted crop seemed overwhelming. He doubted. He lost faith.

Before he returned to his old life I pointed out that the beautiful half-dead, half-alive oak tree in front of my house was here to remind him too that we can live seemingly alive on the outside, yet dying on the inside....

He chose to die, although not consciously, he nonetheless told the universe that what he had asked for, bliss and happiness, was really not the fruit he wanted to reap in this life time. Mediocrity, boredom and therefore death, however, was all he knew.

And so he returned (and with it to an early grave)...

As long as you live in this body you have a choice. And as long as you have a choice you can always choose to resurrect your Self, in spite of the previous choices you made, even if you chose death in the past.

Now go forth and choose life!

Goddess Guinevere - True Love

2009-05-02T13:11:00.000-07:00

Hi Everyone, it's been a while since I've been posting here. I haven't gone anywhere, at least not physically...it's good to be back and post new lessons learned so you too can be nourished and grow.

I have for a long time already been holding "gatherings" each morning and before I retire each night. One of these "games" I play with our loving goddessess surrounding us at all times. Today's message comes from Guinevere. No one knows better how to deliver messages in our plain English language than Doreen Virtue. Here is Guinevere's message:

True Love:

"The romantic stirring in your heart have propelled the universe to deliver great love to you."

Meaning of this message: Your soulmate relationship is soon arriving...

The universe knows how ready I am!

What touched me and brought me to tears is Guinevere's story. This Celtic triple goddess has anciet roots preceding Arthurian times, when she was known as Gwenhwyfar. In her original form, her name meant "White One" or "White Phantom," and she was a powerful goddess invoked for both fertility and as a bridge to take the dead to the afterlife plane. During the times of Avalong, Glastonbury, and King Arthur, she became Guinevere. To become king, Arthur had to merge with, or marry, Gwenhwyfar, the goddess who ruled over the land. And so Gwenhwyfar became the astonishingly beauitful Guinevere, the queen bridge of the new King Arthur. Legend holds that her heart really belongd to Arthur's cousin, Lancelot, however, Today, she helps us ensure that we enter into partnership with our true love, and she assists in keeping that love alive.

The pictures here are samples of Guinevere with King Arthur and her with her love, Lancelot.

Think of Guinevere's sacrifice to have lived with a man she didn't love, King Arthur, while having to hold her love for her beloved Lancelot. Perhaps she did this for the greater good of the land and its people. In either case, think of the ultimate sacrifice she made: to become the goddess protecting each of our "halves" so only two twin souls can be reunited with each other (if they choose so). So no one has to "settle" for anyone "less than" our true love.

What ultimate sacrifice!

What I learned is that I have not only my ancestors, angels, fairies and others are here to help me (and you) along this journey of love, we also have powerful gods and goddesses who have died for this very cause and are forever roaming eternity paving our paths to help us reunite with true love.

Don't settle - hold out and work on yourself so you're truly READY for your beloved.

May God speed your paths...

More Love to Accompany You Today

2009-04-07T14:46:00.000-07:00

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength; loving someone deeply gives you courage.

Lao Tzu

Take away love and our earth is a tomb.

Robert Browning

The moment you have in your heart this extraordinary thing called love and feel the depth, the delight, the ecstasy of it, you will discover that for you the world is transformed.

Jiddu Krishnamurti

You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.

Andre Gide

True love is like thosts, which everyone talks about and few have seen.

Francois deLaRochefoucauld

I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can e no more hurt, only more love.

Mother Theresa

In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.

Bill Cosby

Love Quotes - to Brighten Your Day

2009-04-06T12:54:00.001-07:00

Love is the immortal flow of energy that nourishes, extends and preserves. Its eternal goal is life.

Smiley Blanton

The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread.

Mother Theresa

We are all born for love. It is the principle of existence, and its only end.

Benjamin Disraeli

Where there is love there is life.

Mohandas Gandhi

Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit.

Kahlil Gibran

And on a personal note I'd like to add that Love is Everything, the Beginning and the End, the Purpose of all Existence.

Falling Trees, Broken Hearts, Misconceptions and Moving On

2009-03-02T11:50:00.001-08:00

A while back I had met a man whom I soon came to think of as my possible Twin Soul. It was out of this world how similar we were and yet how we satisfied both spectrums of the energetic pole. It was truly as if we were two halves joining back together. And please don't think that we're "halves" walking around, or that we're incomplete without another person. Not at all.

And yet in spite of our agreement that our relationship was one out of a billion, he chose someone else. Our light scared him so much that he didn't come through for us. It has taken me weeks now to "recover" and trying to wrap my head around what really happened, how anyone can possibly let such a whole relationship go and settle for mediocrity.

I went to the library for answers. I went there looking for something, but I didn't know what. I just knew I would get answers there. I came across an audio tape presentation from Caroline Myss called "Sacred Contracts." I had been "preaching" sacred agreements for decades, mostly to myself. It's as if we return to this plane with the people we have arrangements with to meet and go through various lessons in this life. It's an act of love really. And yet most of us scuff at the idea that we return with a person so they can hurt us and we in turn have to learn forgiveness. Yet that's exactly how it is.

Caroline Myss and her "Sacred Contracts" reminded me of this bigger picture and it helped me have compassion on the choices this man made. When I first realized that he didn't choose "us" I got angry and hurt and disappointed. I cried all day long, cried myself to sleep, wrote a lot and went on and on asking God for mercy. All day long I said: "Mercy, God, please have mercy on me and take this pain away."

I spent the second week learning from "Sacred Contracts" and slowly my feelings of anger turned into feelings of abandonment and victimhood. "Poor me, he left me, how could he throw such a beautiful thing away." I found wisdom in the woods, hiking and crying to God, hugging trees and getting mercy from the land that takes "abuse" every season out of the year.

I spent the third week practicing compassion and understanding while realizing that he did stick to our agreement, whatever this agreement was. It wasn't meant for him to choose me, or he would have. It was our agreement for him NOT to choose me so I could learn forgiveness and compassion, and so he perhaps could feel loss and learn how to take personal responsibility. Both of us learn the valuable lesson not to be victims but to realize that we're creators.

During my last hike in the woods a few days ago, I continued praying for him and myself, asking God to speak to me with his all-wise and compassionate all-knowing and all-seeing existence. I had taken this hike several times and knew the trails pretty good. This time it was different. It had rained the day before and it was a bit stormy. The trails were covered with fallen branches and dead wood all around me. I had to step over them constantly. I looked at the trees above me and the dead branches on the trails and all around me and suddenly it hit me like a brick wall...

We're like trees, we get planted and we grow and our roots get stronger and deeper as the years go on. Our leafs are like the people or the experiences that come and go in and out of our lives. The slightest wind, or at least Fall, will make them go away. Branches are part of the tree structure. They hold up the tree and make sure the tree's equilibrium remains balanced. The leafs of these trees had fallen way back in Fall, however, it's now March and the trees are getting ready to form new buds and new blossoms. BUT, and this is a big BUT, before this new growth can take place, the tree has to shake off its dead weight. The branches that no longer are able or capable of carrying leafs and thus buds. These branches would only draw nutrients from the tree that are better used by the branches that do hold buds and flowers. So nature has this built-in shedding process by sending rain and winds to get rid of dead material.

We too, as people, get involved in relationships, jobs and affairs of life that may be non-beneficial for our long term growth and well being. It may start out great, strong and lush looking, but as soon as life brings rain and wind, the branch cracks and falls off.

So rather than being sad at the loss, I now continue my lesson in realizing that just because this relationship with this man is not what it seemed, doesn't mean he was bad or the relationship was bad and therefore it is now "rotten" and had to die. Not at all. Because just like branches and leaves fall to the ground provide nourishment for life on earth, this relationship continues to do "its thing" inside of me and inside of him. In other words, just like a dead branch provides food for a termite and other beings, this seeming dead relationship now continues providing me with nourishment of lessons. Just like the branch only seems dead, what really happened is that it just grew too weak to remain connected to the overall tree. Relationships often become too weak, for whatever reason, and they "fall."

While I'm still hurting quite a bit about "what could have been" in this relationship, I'm also accepting that we must have had an amazing contract and we stuck to it. So one day when we're on the other side, we get to hug and give each other high fives for having helped each other with lessons that I could never have learned without him.

Sex, God, Money, Politics

2009-01-23T15:45:00.000-08:00

There are a few things most people don’t want to talk about. They are: Sex, God, Money, Politics (which inadvertently mixes together the first three).

Let’s talk about the S word (as my daughter would say). There is so much to say about sex, the need for it, the origin of it, its past and its future, its actual purpose (depending on whom you ask) and what can and cannot be accomplished with it. We can look at sex as the merging of feminine and masculine, a physical act for the reasons to procreate (instinct), a release of energy, obtainment of energy from the other partner, a primal means to calm down, a cleansing ritual, the “coming home” to a blissful state, recharging ones batteries, arriving at heaven for a moment of rest, and so on.

Depending on whom we talk to, we’ll get as many different opinions about the need for sex and what happens during sex as there are people on this planet. No one is right and no one is wrong. We’re all on our own journey and what may seem wrong to me may be a way for someone else to survive. A great book to read is Power vs. Force by Dr. David Hawkins. Growing up I used to judge people who smoke, drink or do drugs. Because that is what I grew up with and I saw the effect on the surrounding world. I was born having difficulties breathing because my parents both smoked and my mother smoked when she was pregnant with me. My father was an alcoholic and I saw him screw up his relationship with my mother (I’m sure she had her part in the break-up too). Sex became bad because my Dad cheated on my Mom and ended up leaving us for “the other woman.” Soon I came to view all of “it” as bad, as unnecessary, as evil and as a nuisance. It was my journey and needless to say if I ever would get married it would have to be to a man who didn’t want sex from me. Good luck! Like that was going to happen.

Dr. Hawkins book really helped me understand why people do what they do, without the need to judge anyone. Once I was divorced I went on a journey to find out what sex really meant to both men and women. I came across Nancy Fiday’s books, which helped me tremendously in understanding the human species. Animals don’t have a choice in mating or not mating, they are ruled by instinct and are primal, pro-creation and survival is there number one concern. Humans do have free will and we make a conscious choice, something an animal cannot do. Still, so much is happening as two people merge their bodies together to becoming one. Just like any battery has a + and a – part of the energetic pole, once activated the battery is capable to charge a piece of equipment up. Similarly, when a + male and a – female merge their bodies, they undoubtedly create “something.”

When a battery is being used or charged up there is only energy oscillating between the + and – parts of the battery. Unfortunately when two human batteries comes together to merge and create energy, worlds are created (or destroyed). It’s not just a physical energy exchange, the merging is manifesting so much more with consequences that most people don’t want to know or hear about; if people could just see the spirals and vortexes and funnels that are emanating from them and merging with the other person to forever be implanted into the universal soil called ether, to one day create something very powerful (or very destructive). Little do people know that once they merge with another person on a physical level and funnels and vortexes and spirals have been exchanged, they will forever take that person’s energy with them and be influenced by them. It’s like taking white play dough and mixing it with green play dough and then trying to separate the two, it’s an impossibility. Or putting a drop of ink into a glass of clear water, and then trying to take the drop of ink out of the water that is now tainted.

The more impressive part that most people don’t know about or even imagine that every exchange with another human being is a form of sex exchange. It doesn’t have to be in a romantic way, but in an energetic way. The moment two people lock their eyes together, whether during a conversation or while passing a stranger on the street, both people are constantly “shooting” spirals, vortexes and funnels out into the universe. It’s our essence that we project to the world. When we lock eyes we lock energies with the other person and instantly take a piece of their energy and give them ours. The Sanskrits believe that as soon as a woman sleeps with a man she takes on his entire karma. I happen to believe the same goes for men too. Most people’s energy I frankly don’t care to carry with me. I just am not strong enough to take on other people’s karma, I have enough of my own to work through. And unless the other person’s energy can help me work through my karma I’d rather not pack more unnecessary life times on top of this one.

So why is this such a big deal? Over the past few years I have been a landing place for friends and clients to listen and help them see a part of their existence that can’t be viewed with our regular human eyes. Over the years I started to make a connection to a person’s personal power level and the number of physical partners they have had in their life. This may sound strange, however, what I found is that the more partners anyone had (man or woman) the more “watered down their soul” had become and they had started to lose a piece of their essence. It’s as if every time they had sex with someone they gave the other person a piece of their soul to keep forever. When the relationship or event was over the piece(s) they had given away could not be recovered. I also saw that the more partners someone had, the more they wanted to expand their “territory” and the more “free” they became to be with eve more people. It is a false freedom, however. One that comes at the cost of their own authenticity and may cause a person to go back in line to start their own evolutionary journey once again. For what, I ask.

A person I have known for almost two decades chose to sleep with as many women as he could, he always has, he still does; hundreds of them, perhaps even thousands of them. Today that he is in his 40s he’s realizing that he will never be able to regain the innocence that can only come from having all the pieces to his soul. He’s lost, he doesn’t know anymore what he wants. Women still throw themselves at him, but only because they’ve been sexually frustrated for so long, he spells their sexual freedom, something they perhaps have never experienced. Yet none of them want to stay, not one would ever want to have someone “like him” to be at their side. He’s good “for one thing.” He’s chasing through women constantly looking for the next one, constantly proving his self-fulfilling prophecy that proves that women are only here for one thing: to be used and then tossed to the curb. He has an amazing charm and at first blush really seems to know what women want. But a deeper look into his lonely soul proves otherwise, as do his eyes. The sad part is that he’s looking for an “innocent” woman who hasn’t been around the block as often as he has. Yet how can he ask of the Universe to deliver him Cinderella when he himself doesn’t live like this even to this day?

Just over the past two months I had two friends approach me who both got married young. One got married around 19, the other around 25. Both had slept with “only” 5 women. They are in their 30s now and they are longing for a temporary change and temptation for both of them from the other women is difficult to withstand. They both love their wives, they have children by them and they are committed to staying faithful. If they could just go out and dabble with other women a few times….to kick off those horns, sow the wild oats, to get some more adventure – whatever all these expressions are. What neither of them understand is that one of the reasons they are so irresistible to other women is because of their lack of experience. It’s because they still own their own power, they haven’t given it away, they haven’t slept around, neither of them ever had a one-night stand.

Women being the intuitive beings they are can sense that from 10 miles away and such men become the irresistible magnets. Although women love a man who can show them a thing or two in the bedroom, a man who has the kind of power that can come from a strong and pure soul is rare and every woman intuitively wants to merge with that power, by means of physical exchange. Will they be able to stay faithful to their wives? It’s not for me to predict. I can tell you that if they are both hydrogen and they both married their equivalent parts of oxygen and their marriage equilibrium is water, they will make it without a doubt. What concerns me is that they still long for other oxygen…When hydrogen and oxygen merge, water is the merging’s inevitable result. When two people merge that are truly meant to be together, it will show in evidence in what they create for this world. If there is no evidence, then perhaps the chemistry is lacking to produce that miracle that we all need. So what? You’ve discovered that your partner is indeed not your matching hydrogen or not your matching oxygen. But you’ve said: “Until Death Do Us Part” and perhaps you even have created children that now count on you. What should you do? I can’t tell you what you “should” do. In fact, I have for the most part eradicated that word out of my dictionary. Remember, this is your journey and there is no should or should-nots. It all depends on what you have come here to create.

Why are you here on planet earth? Is your partner’s purpose in alignment with yours and yours with hers? Remember it is life-sustaining and nurturing water you are here to create. If you’re just trotting along next to this person’s life while creating absolutely nothing useful for not only you, but also nothing useful for your child(ren) and even less for the planet, then what are you really doing here? Read “The Greatest Miracle In The World” by Og Mandino. You have a magnificent purpose here on this planet. You are unique as is your partner. No one can take your job, your position, your spouse who is your true oxygen or your true hydrogen, and no one can replace your true purpose here on this planet. The question is, are you about your true purpose yet? Or are you just fiddling around wasting time until the next life time? When I “got this” once and for all I realized that I could stick it out with a man I was never supposed to be with in the first place or I could leave us in peace and become about my purpose and give him the chance so he too can become about his purpose.

I’m not directly responsible for his journey and the decisions he makes, but I am directly responsible for mine and indirectly responsible for everyone else's, including his. However, I can only take responsibility for myself and others if I am first living the free life that I have truly come to live, I am responsible to lead by example. I also am responsible to be a role model to my daughter and to show her that settling for anything less than her purpose and the man who is her exact hydrogen counter part will prove to be futile with only heart ache in sight. She’s almost 15 and she’s already beginning to get it. The moment she sees that she wishes something was different about this other person, is the moment she realizes she is dealing with "a square peg" that she's trying to fit into a round hole. It doesn't work, it never will. I was courageous and loved my husband enough to set him free. This was over 4 years ago and it was the best thing I ever did for everyone involved. Especially this planet and humanity as a whole.

The world is waiting for you!

Using Friends to Dump On

2009-01-15T06:00:00.000-08:00

Do you ever feel so down that you just want to dump on a friend, hoping that it’ll get better? Yet you realize that while you may be feeling better after you “vomited” your sorrows all over her as if she was a garbage can, that the problem actually multiplied rather than disappeared?

I have noticed over and over again in my life that when things go wrong, the first thing I want to do is to call a friend and tell them about it, dump, vent and get advice from my friend. Yet when I learned to go inward and present the challenge to my Higher Self, asking my Higher Self to take over and to transmute the challenge into a blessing, then I come out of it renewed with strength and with the exact answer to the solution. And I spared a friend unnecessary heartache to fix my problem that was never hers to fix in the first place.

Christian Larson would say it this way: “Never think or speak of that which you do not wish to happen. The whine, the sting, and the sigh – these three must never appear in a single thought or a single word. You can win ten times as many friends by talking happiness as you can by talking trouble. And the more real friends you have the less trouble you will have. Speak well of everything good you find and mean it. When you find what you do not like keep quiet. The less you think or speak of what you do not like the more you have of what you do like. Magnify the good; emphasize that which has worth; and talk only of those things that should live and grow. When you have something good to say, say it. When you have something ill to say, say something else.”

It's nice to have great friends, those you can vent to without being judged. However, just as Larson says above, it not only diminishes the strength of your fabric that holds together your friendship, but it also dillutes the concentration of what you're really trying to accomplish, which is to create happiness. Now you're unhappy and so is your friend, your problem has been multiplied and if your friend goes and tells her friend or her therapist, then you have a real big soup of a mess. Instead, try to go inward, pray, meditate, bring your sorrows before God or your Higher Self, come out of it with a clear answer and then tell your friend:

1. The challenge
2. What you learned in your meditation
3. And how you're going to solve the problem

Most importantly stick to the advice you received from the "inside" and only consider what your friend has to say. This way you're not a burden to them because you're not looking to them for the answer, because you already have the answer. It shows them that you do internal work first, it shows how strong you are, they might learn something and they leave you strengthened and encouraged because you're not leaning on them.

It's a tough concept because most people will say: "That's what friends are for."

So here is my dare to you: try it. Next time you want to jump on the phone and call your friend to vent, go inside first, no matter how many times you need to "go there" and only once you have the answer from within will you share your lesson with your friend. Watch what happens...

Poem About Loss - by Bianca

2009-01-14T19:43:00.000-08:00

This poem was written by a 15-year old:

I would have traveled the world for you
From Earth to the sky didn’t buy me enough time with you
3 years down Bonnie & Clyde with you
Like a tree with no root
It didn’t make sense without you
It wasn’t possible without you, together forever with you
But forever ended with you, forever wasn’t easy with you
Forever wasn’t possible with you
It was always draining with you
Never easy with you, lies with you, cheating with you, pain with you
I’ll never be the same because of you but to this day I love you

Transmutation - Transformation

2009-01-14T06:00:00.000-08:00

Hhhhm, one of my all time favorite words is "Transmutation" (or Transformation). I love change, although it can be scary. Change has always blessed me with the unknown and the unknown has always had suprise blessings in store for me. So it is only natural that I want to share this with you...

Christian Larson: “When the creative energies are daily transmuted, and turned into muscle, brain and mind, a virtuous life can be lived without inconvenience. Besides, the body will be healthier, the personality stronger and the mind more brilliant. Hold yourself constantly in a positive, masterful attitude, and fill that attitude with kindness. The result will be that remarkable something that people call personal magnetism. Create energy when retained in the system will give vigor to the body, sparkle to the eye, and genius to the brain. There is enough power in any man to enable him to realize all his desires and reach the highest good he has in view. It is only necessary that all of this power be constructively applied.”

Before you blame God or the people around you, or even yourself, that you are not blessed and your Twin Soul and "one and only" is just not finding you, remember that s/he will stand before you when you can accept your exact mirror image. And not before...

Letting Go vs. Holding On

2009-01-13T06:00:00.000-08:00

When is it appropriate to “let go” someone vs. to “hold on” to someone?

Have you ever felt like someone is your Twin or could be your Twin but there are also things about them that make you wonder?

Have you ever had a situation where you knew the right thing to do but you didn’t do the right thing out of loyalty to that person, or perhaps out of the addiction you have to that person?

You may have spent your childhood with that person or a big part of your adult life, and you can’t imagine them not being there anymore. But the pain you feel because of the choices they make, is almost unbearable. So when do you cut the line, draw the line, shift the line or do whatever you have to with “this line” and send them on their way so you don’t have to compromise your Self anymore?

A few years ago I had let a best friend of 12 years go because what I found out about her was so contradictory to my own beliefs and my own values, that she became the “test” for me to see if I would sell out or not. I struggled with the reality of judging her. I didn't want to judge her for the choices she made, and at the same time I wasn't willing to turn my head away from those parts that would jeopardize my own integrity. I let her go and today, more than 4 years later, I have no regrets about it. In fact, after our parting other people of much higher quality of character started to enter my life and life took a turn for the better for me.

A couple of years later I tried to remember the blessings that came out of me sticking up for what is right and I tried to have a similar talk with a friend and it didn't go over too well. I found myself in a similar boat and I had to make the same decision once again. And it was harder this time, as most tests are, even though it “shouldn’t” be. I struggled to “cut loose” and “let go” but I didn't want to “hold on” to the friendship either – because I overall realized that we had already lost whatever we had to hold on to for dear life.

I have a saying and belief that whatever is mine cannot be taken away from me. So if it’s mine and I let it go, it will come back to me tenfold. If it doesn’t come back it was never mine to begin with. Why is it so hard to break other people’s hearts just so we can stay in integrity with our own karma and life journey?

I did let go and today, more than 2 years later I see how it was the absolutely best thing, once again, for all parties involved. It took me a long time to get over hurting this person's feelings. Hard at first, heart-breaking even, but time is a great healer and new people of even higher integrity started to appear.

A year later I was given the opportunity again, just to test myself one more time, the entire "sifting process" took less than a month. The healing process took less than a day. It's the way lessons work. The first time is hard, the second time is even harder. However, if we put our integrity (or God) at the top of our priority list, suddenly you realize that the third time is easy. And then suddenly you realize that you have a strength about your character that serves as a repellent and new people without integrity won't even come into your energetic field. And better yet, those that do come into your field because they want to change and they're looking to get nourishment from you. Now THAT is the true blessing.

Follow Your Vision

2009-01-12T06:00:00.000-08:00

Christian Larson encourages us to “Follow the vision of the soul. Be true to your ideals no matter what may happen now. Then things will take a turn and the very things you wanted to happen will happen. “

The ideal has a positive drawing power towards the higher, the greater and the superior. Whoever gives his attention constantly to the ideal, therefore, will steadily rise in the scale.

“Take things as they are today and proceed at once to make them better. “ Expect every change to lead you to something better and it will. As your faith is so shall it be. “To be human is not to be weak. To be human is to be all that there is in man, and the greatness that is contained in the whole of man is marvelous indeed.”

Sometimes I find myself wanting to be weak and lowly and sit and dwell, feeling almost sorry for myself. Sulking in the “bad” and letting my energy sit low and dormant. It’s during those times that people who have tended to their self-discipline pick themselves up and say “no more, I’ve had enough of this” – and because of that tactic in spite of them wanting to stay “low” that they succeed. So if you feel weak and like you’re wanting to give up, remember that life comes and goes in cycles with a precise rhythm, don’t give up, keep on going and enjoy every moment of it: the good and the seeming not so good.

Gifts of Heaven - Helping our Soldiers

2009-01-11T11:58:00.000-08:00

Someone had asked me what I meant by giving "gifts of heaven." We can give someone a material gift or even food and clothing, and it may mean the world to someone. As soon as the food is consumed and the clothing unuseable the gift deteriorates and possibly will be forgotten before long. And did it really have the lasting impact that you wanted to have?

Gifts of heaven are gifts you retrieve from deep within yourself and bring out in a way so the other person will be a changed person for life. We all give gifts of heaven at all times, sometimes knowingly, and many times unknowingly. Perhaps you remember that one thing you heard someone say that resounded in your ears for many years to come. Little did that person know that they would have such an impact on your life, and yet it's because of where you were on your journey that their words were and are still so impactful in your life. Gifts of heaven cannot be bought and no dollar value can be assigned to it. Those are the gifts that we all long for. Gifts such as unconditional love, support, believing in someone no matter what, teaching someone to stand on their own two feet and the like. You have what it takes to give gifts of heaven.

Every day I ask myself if I have given gifts of heaven to somone, be it in form of kindness or even a hug and a smile to a stranger when it was least expected. One of the things dear to my heart is supporting those that have been abandoned or feel abandoned. And whom better to serve than those who are stationed in the Middle East?

Did you know that many do not receive letters and care packages from home?

Did you know that you can send a letter or care package for the cost of regular US postage?

There are two organizations I use to write letters to soldiers. Both are great.

1. http://www.anysoldier.com/WhereToSend
2. http://www.soldiersangels.org

With AnySoldier you can click on the soldier's name and read their requests. With SoldiersAngels you commit to a 3-month term.

There are plenty of ways you can contribute. You can write a letter for the cost of a mere US 1st class stamp and much of your heavenly gifts from within that may help a soldier carry on one more day. Or you can pool a few friends together and ask them each to donate just one item so you can create a care package for them.

Take the time and GIVE of yourself. You may make a difference in another human being's life that may just help them stay alive.

Streams, Brooks, Rivers and Seas

2009-01-11T09:40:00.000-08:00

These last few weeks in my “absence” here on my blog have been a tremendous learning experience and I will do my very best to pass on my lessons in the hope and with the intention that you too may learn and grow. It has been a fantastic time to say the least!

Over the past few weeks I have been getting various visions of rivers, creeks, streams, brooks and even waterfalls. At first all I understood and remembered were the scriptures that talk about rivers. My very name, Chaszey, represents the flow of a river, forever finding the path that is her. King Solomon tells us that “All streams flow into the sea, yet the sea is never full. To the place the streams come from, there they return again.” And John tells us that “streams of living water will flow from within” us. And David tells us that “There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy place where the Most High dwells.” The City he’s talking about is of course your innermost being, the little speck of light that you truly are. It is your God-Self. We all know, or at least I hope that you know, that God (or whatever you call the Light Source) is everything, lives in all and is everywhere. It is that light source that is with you always, that shines a light on your path, even if you run from it, hide it or try to squash it.

As I was getting these various visions of these massive rivers that flow with majesty and might and without making a seeming sound, yet the power of these rivers is unshakeable, deep and almost frightening. Most of these types of rivers are wide, deep and they are fairly straight with large and wide bends, compared to the little creeks and streams. I suddenly realized that this is how true love is supposed to be! Little creeks and streams bubble and make their path to eventually merge with one of those big, quiet, calm and yet powerful rivers, which eventually merges with the big sea again (God). So does this mean that we must have many "little" relationships that eventually will help us graduate to be able to hold the quantity of power that a real and lasting relationship can hold?

Creeks and streams are shallow, as can relationships be, although they make a lot of noise, as can superficial relationships. I realized that the rocks in a river bed that create the sounds and the bubbles and the foam on top of the sparkling water rushing in between their obstacles are just like us trying to squeeze people into our lives that perhaps have no business being there in the first place. Imagine yourself standing at the bend of a river with a whistle and a red flag trying to command the river to take a left turn instead of a right turn. It doesn’t quite happen this way. Yet we continue to try to make people into something they are not. We want to direct the path of their river down our path to merge with our big and calm river, but we forget that we have left our river in order to redirect theirs. All streams will eventually lead into a big and calm river and all rivers will run towards the big sea. And eventually the cycle and rhythm starts over again.

So what is my lesson? While I may feel like a single and individual water drop and my ego wants to remain separate and unique, it is only when I willingly let myself merge with the big sea (God) that I have the whole power of the big sea on my side helping me to achieve what I have come to accomplish. It is not for me to remain a separate water drop, weak and alone and facing the drying out by the scorching sun. It also means that it's okay to have relationships, however far you take them is completely up to the two of you. Remember that there is karma, past lives together, memories from thousands of years ago, perhaps even from other galaxies, these memories are reflected in our every DNA as a holographic picture and we must get to a place where we can be free from memories, torture, and attachment so we can find the way home. All relationships will eventually lead to the "big relationship," the one and only. If you believe this, then you will most likely find this person in this life time. If you think this is a bunch of hog wash, then the Universe will accomodate that wish for you as a reality as well. You're the creator of your own experience.

Remember, finding your Twin Soul will give you the reality of only looking back at yourself, you will find your exact mirror image, the person you have been all along: YOU.

In order to find him or her you must be like the god-source or what will be reflecting back at you is just another person with whom you will walk side-by-side with for a while. Be a deep river, be the sea, be god within you, be your Twin Soul.

It is for me to help others guide to find their own river within and to let them take their own path down that stream and not to redirect their path the way I think it should be. Everyone is a brook, a stream, a river, perhaps you’re even as deep and quiet and powerful as the Amazon river – no matter where you are on your journey, know that your path is guiding you only in one direction: in the direction to be merged with the big sea (the light source within you).

Congratulations on living and tapping into that source of unlimited amount of power within you!

More Viruses

2009-01-11T09:19:00.000-08:00

I apologize once again for the delay in being here. My computer went back to the doctor for more virus removals. Interesting how my life can come to a full halt without the technology of a great computer. I took the chance to be outside and hike the hills of Marin. The past few days have been so incredibly gorgeous that I seemingly had no choice but seek out the local hills, mountains and water. I often hiked for 2+ hours, steep grades, with no one in sight for the entire hike. What a blessed time alone it was. Alone meaning no humans in sight... Stay tuned.

Relationships and their Impact on our Society

2009-01-04T18:27:00.000-08:00

Marriage, divorce and relationships in general have a huge impact on our health and overall well-being. Just this week our county suffered a tragic loss to suicide. A 25 year old young woman who shot herself to death because her boyfriend broke up with her. If you've never "been that low" I hope you can reserve judgment for people who do go to the edge where pain seems too overbearing. The woman was not only beautiful, she was successful, had a great job with lots of promises ahead - yet nothing seemed to heal her heart from her break-up with her boyfriend. Suicide seemed like her only way out. As a suicide prevention counselor I see the complaint about loneliness all too many times, and most never call the hotline to get help. It doesn't have to be this way. Yet this is the reality for so many.

The bible says: "Let no man separate what God has joined together." (Please note that I am not religious and do not belong to any religious groups or churches.) If the word "joined" would have been translated accurately from the Hebrew, the word would actually have been "welded." Welding two people together, or anything that is welded together for that reason, cannot be ripped apart without damage to both parts. Any welder knows this, any jewelry maker knows this. Yet as people we rip apart our own marriages all day long.

But what if we forgot to pay attention to the middle part of the sentence? "Let now man separate WHAT GOD has welded together." What if your marriage wasn't welded together by God at all? What if it's us humans getting infatuation confused with unconditional and true love, which causes us to squeeze a square peg into a round hole? Can we truly say then that God put the marriage together? Some of you may say: "Well, we are all gods, God acts through us, therefore, we are gods of our own lives." Yes, that is very well true - we are also told that "The Heart is deceitful above all things." Knowing that full well, I also know that now looking back, my "red flags" came along right with the feelings of love, of wanting to truly make it work, of wanting to be "at home" with this person for the rest of our lives: "Until Death Do Us Part." I shrugged the red flags under the rug and only looked at the good feelings and intentions, hoping the red flags would disappear over time, or be transformed over time. Ah, I was notorious for HOPING that he'll change, or that IT will change. And it never does, does it Ladies...

And now in hindsight, almost 4 years later, I have learned this wisdom. God never welded together our marriage at all. THAT was the thing we tried to do for almost 15 years, we tried to weld and mold and join and weld some more. But it would never stick long enough. It was exhausting to say the least. And our marriage never welded, never joined, we never succeeded at squeezing the square peg into a round hole...Let’s look at some statistics (Source for all statistics: http://www.divorcereforum.org/):

1. America has the highest divorce rate in the world

2. The number of divorces has quadrupled from 4.3 million in 1970 to 18.3 in 1996

3. Divorces cost Americans $33.3 Billion each year

4. Each divorce costs the government approximately $30,000 in increased food stamps, juvenile delinquencies and increased bankruptcies

5. 75% of all divorces are initiated by women (I heard that 85% of women today don't even want to get married anymore)

6. Divorce counts for a major reason of suicide amongst males

7. There are almost 1 million attempted suicides each year

8. 50% of all children involved never see their fathers again one year after the divorce

9. Children in single family households are twice as likely to develop serious psychiatric illnesses and addictions later in life

10. Approximately 1 million children each year are affected by divorce

11. Fatherless homes account for:
• 63% of youth suicides
• 90% of homeless / runaway children
• 85% of children with behavior problems
• 71% of high school dropouts
• 85% of youth in prison
• 50+ % of teen mothers

What does this statistic have to do with chronic illness?

a. I believe that most illness is caused by stress.
b. I believe that most stress in today's world is caused by mismatching ourselves with the wrong people (not only our marriage or love partners, this also includes the families we live with, the friends we choose, the bosses we choose to work for, and the overall environment we set up around ourselves).

WHY DO WE DO THIS TO OURSELVES? And for what?

Do we suffer "in the name of love?" There is not much love there trying to squeeze a square peg into a round hole, hoping for the square peg to one day fit. It'll never fit. Just like Hydrogen and Peroxide will never make water, a wrongly matched couple will never create anything productive and useful for humanity.

Are you asking yourself just about now: "I wonder if I'm with the right partner." Then read between your own lines, because your answer is within that same question...

There is nothing wrong with waiting for the "one and only" - your Twin Soul. On the contrary: bliss and true love await...

How to Be Detached to the Outcome - Poem about Flow

2009-01-02T06:00:00.000-08:00

The following poem was written by Rita and Joel McInnis. The title of the poem is called "Flow." The poem happens to describe the meaning of my name, and it happens to be the blueprint by which I want to live my life. Perhaps you'll understand yourself a little better after reading it yourself and I certainly hope you can find some guidance for living a more "detached" life.

Reading this poem helps me especially when I want to "let go" of controlling the speed by which my Twin Soul enters my life. When I'm angry and frustrated that he is not here yet, 100% available to me, then I find comfort in this poem. I hope you do too.

Flow
Be As water is
Without friction

Flow around the edges

Of those within your path

Surround within your ever-moving depths

Those who come to rest there –

Enfold them

While never for a moment holding on

Accept whatever distance

Others are moved within your flow

Be with them gently

As far as they allow your strength to take them

And fill with your own being

The remaining space when they are left behind

When dropping down life’s rapids

Froth and bubble into fragments if you must

Knowing that the one of you now many

Will just as many times be one again

And when you’ve gone as far as you can go

Quietly await your next beginning...

Great Twin Souls Video

2008-12-31T21:42:00.000-08:00

When you have 6 minutes to spare, this is a great video about Twin Souls:

Or click here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JEucX_24VRg

Women Make Things Grow...

2008-12-31T19:42:00.000-08:00

Someone sent this quote to me today, I love it.

Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater.
If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby.
If you give her a house, she'll give you a home.
If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal.
If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart.
She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.
So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit.

Go back to the posts about the sun and the moon, women and trees and read about how a woman can only reflect back to a man what he first gave to her.

This may sound like it is a man's fault when things go wrong, and that is not what I am saying at all. If that is what you're reading between the lines then you're probably one of those men who blame things on her PMS or her moodiness and refrain from taking personal responsibility in the first place. Only you would know...

I dare you to try it! Pick a woman, any woman (if you're married hopefully you pick her). Treat her like she is the Queen of this country, literally. Give her the respect and admiration she would deserve if she was truly the Queen (even if you think she doesn't deserve it). Fake it if you must. Give her the love and emotional security she deserves as a Queen (even if you think she doesn't deserve it). Fake it if you must. Do it out of duty if you must (at first). And watch what will happen over the following few days and weeks. Notice her change and start to open up like a flower, watch her radiate like she has never beamed before.

Report your stories back to this blog!

May all your dreams, wishes and hard work come to fruition in 2009 and beyond.

Remember that God gave you the gift of life. What you do with your life is your gift back to God...

Happy New Year Everyone!

The Prison Within

2008-12-30T13:23:00.000-08:00

Many years after his miraculous escape from prison, a tinsmith recounts what made his escape possible. His wife, a weaver, had woven the design of the lock to his prison cell ino the prayer rug upon which he prayed five times a day. Realizing that the prayer rug contained the design of his cell's lock, he struck a deal with his jailers to get tools to make small artifacts, which the jailers then sold and profited from. Meanwhile, he also used the tools to create a key to his cell, and one day made his escape.

The moral of the story is that understanding the design of the lock that keeps us imprisoned can help us create the key that will unlock it. It also describes the condition of most of humanity: imprisoned in the labyrinth of our own lives. At times of a crisis feelings such as inadequacy, deficiency, emptiness, lonliness and unhappiness, we may get some insight glimpse to our true confinement. The prison we're in has been created by us, and the key to unluck this prison is within us as well.

Just a little while ago I had a conversation with a 52 year old single man told me that while he is looking for the love of his life, all his married buddies don't want to go home to their wives. They feel like their homes have become their prisons. We had an interesting discussion about marriage, home life, being devoted and dedicated to another person and putting that ring on the finger. What does it all mean?

Having been married myself for 15 years and now having been single for nearly 5 years, I understand the "dilemma" of finding "the one and only" and I too think about whether or not I ever want to get married again. After a disussion with a good friend we came to the conclusion that married people go home because they "have to." Single people go home because they "want to." I'm grossly generalizing, of course, but perhaps you understand.

The way I see it for me is that I first need to realize, see, and admit that I am living in a self created prison. I created it, I can also create the key to get out of it. "Out there" is freedom and yet paradoxically "out there" really means "in here." Only when I am free within can I be free without and can I attract my other (also free) Twin Soul. And together we can live a life free from burdens and "shoulds" and "should nots" and enjoy the freedom and peace that comes from "letting be" and complete detachment.

Much love for 2009!

2008-12-28T10:33:00.000-08:00

I miss you so much, my Twin Soul!

I watched one of the most amazing movies this past week. It's called "The Notebook." What an incredible story of love, til the end. I sobbed and cried - it made me think, it made me grow.

After watching the movie I went to bed and felt compelled to read the bible. I love God's wisdom and how he constantly cares for me and helps me grow. I learned that “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.”

It dawned on me that I get fearful when I think of you being with someone else or you never coming into my life, or me failing to recognize you when you show up. But according to the above, there is no fear in love. And perfect love drives out fear. The message I get is that fear has to do with punishing myself but what do I punish myself for over and over again? I’m done punishing myself. I don’t want to hurt anymore, I just want to love you unconditionally and endlessly. Then I read the following, perhaps you’ve heard it before.

"Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking.
It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails."

And yet I see so clearly how I am not patient with those around me, definitely not kind at times. I can be rude and self-seeking, only worried about my own hurt, definitely angry and yes, at times I hold a record of wrong of all the things that have happened to me. I delighted in my misery and I failed at protecting us, did not trust God, gave up hope and did not persevere. I fail when I go against all of these and actually push you away from me, rather than attracting you closer to me, and I’m gaining a new perspective of what it means to truly love someone. I had tried in my marriage, and I failed then. I am given a second chance and I don’t want to make mistakes that have to do with love.

I want to succeed at loving you! Because you and we so deserve it.

I realize that as my Twin Soul you will stand before me as my exact mirror image. If I am fearful of love then you are unable to show up in front of me, because my fear would keep you far from me. I get it now.

So I am giving you permission to call me on this. I vow that I will do my best to always be patient with you and those around me, to be kind to you and those around me, to rejoice with the truth, to protect you and us, to trust you, to continually hope and to persevere. I want my love for you to always succeed. If I fail it’s not on purpose (and you know that I will stumble many more times), it’s because somehow I must feel that I need to punish myself. Please guide me to the truth gently but firmly. Remind me, ask me if I am walking in love. Ask for my silence so I won’t hurt us, and hold me while I regain my ground.

And so it is.

Christmas and Viruses

2008-12-24T10:17:00.000-08:00

Gee - what a couple of weeks it's been. My computer contracted a virus slash worm and slowly but surely things started to go wrong, until it wouldn't start at all anymore. I just got it back yesterday, and it still doesn't work right. I apologize for the lack of entries.

Being without a computer, when all you do is with the computer, is an interesting experience. Suddenly you're options of expression are a notebook, the telephone and good old in-person communication. I got a lot of those things done these past few days.

Wishing everyone a great holiday season and a splendid New Year!

Love,

Chaszey

Breaking Bowls - Breaking Hearts

2008-12-14T10:26:00.001-08:00

Someone sent me an e-mail to yesterday’s post, asking what was the “thing” that made me choose to end the relationship and if I would ever “take him back.” The answers bare to be posted here, because I understand that there are so many out there in similar situations who are hurting.

There was not “one thing” that made me leave, it was an accumulation of pains and hurts over time. It was the continual begging to stop being hurt and the continual abandonment and being ignored in my request. In the end it came down to leadership. I'm a strong woman and I need to be led powerfully by my man just like the sun controls the entire galaxy and the moon reflects her sun's rays of sunlight, I too could only reflect what he first gave me. I started to wither under his cheating rays, not knowing how to deal with it, how to reflect it back to him. I brought my sorrow to him and asked him to deal with it and fix it. He wouldn't. He continued hurting me. Perhaps that's why people's first reaction is to go out and cheat too. I function very differently when it comes to hurt and I certainly would never want to cause the pain I feel on the other person. I want to overcome evil with good. But the good I did wasn't enough, he continued hurting me.

When someone lies to you and they come forward with the truth, show remorse, ask for forgiveness and then do whatever it takes, including bending over backwards, to restoring that broken trust, over time you can perhaps regain your trust in that person. Of course, best would have been if the lie never would have been told in the first place. In the case of continual cheating or continued lying, no matter what the situation is, it’s a whole different ballgame for me. You can’t cheat on someone knowing that it hurts the other person and give a lame “I’m sorry” and expect trust to be restored when in fact you have no intention to stop hurting that person you supposedly love so much. Life and love don’t function this way. Abuse perhaps does.

What’s more important in a relationship: Love or Trust?
Can you live with Love but without Trust?
Can you live with Trust but without Love?

In my opinion Trust IS Love. I can’t live with Love but without Trust, because they are one and the same to me.

As we became more and more intertwined in each other and we started to feel what each other was feeling even when we were apart, when one awoke in the middle of the night to feel the other person’s anxiety, and when I started to be so in tune with his body and spirit that I could slip into his bloodstream to “float around and have a look” to the point where I could see his blood pressure go up or down, it became increasingly difficult to feeling unsafe with that very same person. It will always be beyond me how anyone can say that they love someone and turn around and sleep with someone else. He could have spit in my face and it wouldn't have been as degrading or hurtful.

It got to a point where I would literally feel him having been with this other person. I felt it on every level of my being. It felt as though miniature soldiers were inside of me cutting in half my every blood cell, every molecule and every atom of my being. I literally felt sliced in half.

The anticipation and fear of having to go through so much pain over and over again caused me get curled up in a fetal position on my couch or in my bed crying and asking “why” and “please make it stop” and “please stop hurting me so much” over and over again to the point where I would feel like I was about to throw up. I never got an answer that made sense.

There came a time when I asked myself why I would put myself through so much agony - what for?

Each of us have a replica of a golden bowl somewhere on another plane. Each bowl consists of a unique sound, it is your sound, it is what makes you tick, it is what you use to get back into balance. We hear this sound on a daily basis as we go through life. Whether it be from a car zooming by, a bird chirping, a door closing or a person talking. This tone of yours is present all around you and you pick it up completely subconsciously as you go through life. Without hearing or making this tone you would literally die. It’s the vibration of this tone that holds everything together (yes, even deaf people can “hear” this sound). That’s why some people’s voices are soothing to you and others are irritating to you. Some speak “your tone” and others conflict with it.

The language of the Native Americans is soley comprised of these sounds. The goddess Isis was given the key to unlock the sounds by the God Ra that would allow her to instantly manifest anything she wanted. When you are so in love with another person that you can “hear” their bowl resounding just by you touching them is when you know you’ve got a once in a life time chance of having a relationship that can’t be manufactured, can’t be learned, can’t be obtained, can’t be tweaked at a therapist’s office, such a relationship “just is.” No effort needed to making you sink into each other and becoming truly one being. Your bowls become one. When you have such a relationship you know you have reached heaven on earth and you protect it with all your might; nothing becomes as important as protecting and fostering and nurturing the growth and safety of this sacred and holy union.

I believe we had this opportunity and I also believe that he destroyed it by not protecting it and by shattering our bowl. And so I walk away broken-hearted, perhaps until another life time when he's ready to see what I see, and know what I know.

Unfortunately for me I “saw and heard” more than he did and his actions shattered the bowl we both shared together. The little girl in me went on for weeks picking up the broken pieces, trying silently to put them back together, only so he would shatter them again.

It was when I woke up in the middle of the night over and over again, crying, waking up for days on out with swollen eyes, not feeling like I was heard or taken seriously, but feeling like I was nailed to the cross each time he was with this other person, that I realized that I was the one allowing this pain to continue for as long as I didn’t stop it. Yes, love shouldn’t be this way, it shouldn’t hurt this way. Your partner should hear you and hold you sacred and do whatever it takes to heal the pain, especially when he is the cause of it.

Would I ever take him back?

I don't believe in going backwards and I dislike it when people say: "I want things the way they were back when." We are a growing, changing, moving and ever evolving people. You can never bring things back, you can create new experiences and new memories. Having said that, the fact remains that he still feels so much like he was my Twin Soul, and I am trying to sort out in my meditations if it is possible for one half to "lag behind" on the spiritual journey by so much distance that he could put his other half through so much torture. Logically speaking people are unique and on their own individual journey, of which parts are walked alongside others. We never have the exact and identical journey as another person, it's what makes us humans, it's this thing called "free will" and "freedom of choice."

Having said that what remains for me to look at is the character trait he has of being able to hurt me in ways that I have never been hurt before. And doing it continuously and in spite of me begging to stop. I am concerned that even if he had a change of heart, that eventually and over time he would revert back to a cheating stance and let me down again. During my own 14 year marriage I had one thought of being unfaithful to my husband, it was during a most unhappy and abandoned time in my marriage, and I remember feeling the guilt of the thought. It bothered me so much that I confessed it within just a few days of having had the thought. I felt terrible about letting my husband down, even if only in my mind. He graced me with mercy and forgave me. Cheating or even the thought of it is simply unthinkable to me, I just don't have it in me. And I would like to think that my Twin Soul doesn't have it in him either. The fact that this person does have it in him and not only that, but continued to slice me in half over and over and over again, knowing and seeing me in agony, tells me that he just doesn't care to provide that safe space for me that he demands for himself.

In the end he's made his choice more than once, and to this day the little girl is on her knees picking up the pieces to making her bowl whole again. Will I regret having let the most beautiful relationship go? The only regret is not knowing what could have been. The relationship was so beautiful that when my true Twin Soul shows up it will truly be earth shattering. If this guy was a "taste" of what's to come, then watch out because it will be truly magnificant. So I have only love and compassion and empathy and safety to look foward to. Something this person wasn't willing to truly offer me whole heartedly.

You had also asked if I was having any hard feelings towards this person and how I managed to let him go in peace. In all honesty, I do have hard feelings towards him and it's a continual struggle for me to sever the cords and ties. He will always be such an integral piece of who I am and every heartbeat of mine pumps a holographic replica of our union through my veins. It's as if I can't get rid of him or his memory, no matter how hard I try. I work on forgiveness daily, even hourly.

Remember, time is a great healer. And whether or not I'll ever be able to rid myself of these holographic memory patterns in my blood stream and energetic field is not so important as it is to wrap him up in the golden light that spells love and forgiveness. I don't know what his future holds, this relationship we had may just have been the only true relationship he ever experiences, leaving him searching and longing for the rest of his life, regreting having let go the most beautiful thing he ever had. That would be a shame indeed, because nothing is worse than having let go your one true love when it was in your power to nourish it and grow it and make it be whatever you wanted it to be. If he truly knew and felt what his actions put me through, I'm sure he wouldn't have done it. Ignorance is bliss in many situations. I gave up the right to be ignorant a long time ago.

Having said that, he is a wonderful person and has so many qualities that I have longed for in a man. If there ever was a person I felt like I clicked with in unison, it is him. If there ever was someone I felt truly ONE with, it's him. If there was every anyone I could see myself grow old with, it's him. If there was ever a man I wanted to surrender to, it's him. Unfortunately, when I pushed against him and told him to stay away, he obliged instead of pushing against me and leading me even harder, telling me and showing me that he truly felt the same. He crumbled, he gave in and gave up, instead I needed him to man up. If there is one thing I have learned it's that we can't squeeze square pegs into round holes. No matter the pounding, the edges will never be round enough to be a perfect fit. So let go of the tiresome and unnecessary work and see it as an amazing learning experience. I love him for giving me the gift to stay strong and to stay true to myself; for allowing me to walk through the fire, no matter how much it hurts. When I said "don't call or come by anymore" his response was "I'm sorry the timing for our relationship was off." Instead I needed him to come from a place of "I'll do whatever it takes."

As far as my future is concerned, it looks shiny, bright and happy and filled with true love because it is all I have to offer. I don't have it in me to hurt someone else, to cheat, to lie and deceive. I gave up living like that a long time ago, it takes too much energy to be something that I am not. I'm a lot more at peace being the woman I have come to be. A Tigress she is. It's just going to take the right man, her Twin Soul, who is willing to step up to the plate and bring her forth and out into the open where she can live in safety, knowing that her love will always hold her in utmost safety and would never do anything to hurt her. I look forward to that day and I know that day is just around the corner...

All my love to you, Readers!

Saying Goodbye - Watch the Movie

2008-12-14T09:44:00.000-08:00

Spirituality and Sex - What Went Wrong?

2008-12-14T06:26:00.000-08:00

How many times have you heard someone say: "We live only once." (Translation: Therefore, let's go out and commit all the evil we can while we have a chance...)

We live and sleep around as if we truly did live only once. Unfortunately what takes place on a spiritual level when two people merge their bodies, be in in the way of true Twin Soul love or a "quickie" with someone with "no strings attached," matters and shapes your energetic DNA and your future life times.

We have heard of the "law of balance," or at least of something called "duality." Up and down, in and out, as above so below, and so on. Everything that happens on this physical plane also happens on a non-physical level. When we die we leave this physical body, this shell if you will, behind. We take with us the memory of what we have experienced in this life time as well as all previous life times. Based on these memories we formulate the lessons we need to learn in our future life times to come.

Most know that we have what's called an aura. Just like a flame on a candle gives out a beautiful light around its flame, we too have a flame inside of us, which is our soul, and it too gives out a beautiful light around us, which we call aura. This aura is of an energetic nature and can have rips and tears and streaks in it just like any other fabric. Everything and everyone we encounter, whether in our real body or just inside our minds, shapes and colors our aura.

Being in a room with another person immediately affects your aura, for the better or worse, depending on the other person's energy and your weakness or strength to uphold your own frequency.

Just like we recharge batteries with masculine and feminine energy, our bodies get recharged by merging our physical bodies with our counterparts. We need this life giving and life sustaining merging in order to recharge our batteries (our bodies) and continue on with life. Merging with just anybody can have detrimental effects on our bodies. It's of utmost importance that we merge with only the person who is as close to equal as possible to our energetic charge or our battery (body) gets damaged. Electricity always travels downhill faster than it does uphill. The same principle applies when you merge your body with someone whose energetic callibration is of a much lesser strength than yours. You being the higher vibrational being are being pulled down much faster than the other person is raised to your frequency.

Merging your body in ecstasy with the right person, your Twin Soul, opens up your channels to art, innovation, creation, progress, life, growth, change, inventions and everything good in life. We always merge our energies with people we meet physically or even only on a mental level. Where this meeting becomes even more powerful is if our bodily fluids become part of this exchange. It is during these interactions that energy exchanges become actual links like those in a chain, and our DNA strands become interlocked. The person you want to be interlocked with forever is your Twin Soul, not some stranger you met at the local bar for a one night stand. Unfortunately that person's DNA is now interlocked with you too, long after you've already forgotten his name, if you ever even got his name.

Our auras are affected to certain levels of degrees. If you look at a child you see its pure aura surrounding its being. If you look at a prostitute you see her aura of a tainted and merky matter. The more physical partners anyone has had, the more "watered down," distorted and weak their aura looks and feels.

Sexual intercourse creates an even more intense bond energetically and physically, than if you're just shaking a person's hand and sit next to them during a business dinner. Allowing a man to penetrate you is allowing him to interlock your DNA with his on a forever plane. Receiving and absorbing his physical bodily fluids fills your DNA with the entire blueprint of all of his memories, this life time as well as past life times. In fact, the Sanskrit's believe that a woman who sleeps with a man takes on his entire karma at the time of intercourse. Energy strands known as "cords" remain attached to both of you, long after your relationship is over. His energy is with you for years and life times to come, until your karma with this person is resolved. It should take an act of love to be willing to take on another person's karma and live with them for life and help each other resolve each other's karma, rather than enjoy a few thrills of bodily orgasms, which only serve to add to your current karma rather than reduce it.

Two people who are truly Twin Souls are able to literally feed each other through these cords, anything from energetic foods of positive thoughts to spurts of happiness. This cord is their lifeline to each other. It's this person you want to interlock with for eternity, because your Twin Soul in essence is a replica of you, it is you, your mirror image, you only reversed. Anyone else is an intruder and will cause your energy to dissipate over time, making you sick physically and mentally, incapable of thinking straight or producing anything of value in this life.

Our planet Earth is our home, it's where we all live and enjoy her boundless resources. Imagine if we just took and took and took and took and completely depleted her resources, we'd have no home left to live in. The same goes for our bodies. Our body is our home, we have to watch our resources (energy) and how we spend our energy. We can't give our energy out freely and merge with people we have no business merging with. In doing so we only deplete our own planet, our own body. Just like we can't use the planet as a dumpsite, we can't use our body to feed it garbage (sex that is not based on love and is not based on rejuvinating both partners).

This doesn't mean that we should only have sex with the person we married, especially not if you realize that the person you married was the wrong person for you in the first place. In doing so you only further damaging your own body, your aura and your spiritual journey on this plane. Instead, remove yourself from that person, cleanse yourself of that person's energy, their cords and your karma with them. Merge with only one person who is your Twin Soul so you can gain the highest benefit from your "battery recharging system." Look at this union as a bucket or container into which both of you pour your heart-energy into. When the bucket is full you can feed off of it for a long time to come, when the container is empty you fill it up again (by having more sex). But you never, ever pour the energy out of the bucket onto the floor where it would spill and go to waste, by merging your sacred energy with somone other than your Twin Soul.

If you are being cheated on or you're the cheater, than you're taking the contents of this sacred container and you're wasting what has been poured in holiness. Your aura will reflect this spill and the aura of the person whom you're cheating on will reflect this lack in forms of rips and shreds (that's why you feel like you're being torn to pieces when someone cheats on you, the tearing is real) and with a lack of glow on her face. Watch an unhappy woman carefully and you'll easily pick up a man who lacks responsibility by her side. Watch an unhappy man the same way and you'll quickly pick up an unsurrendered woman by his side. Both meddle in other people's energies and have given up feeding what each other give each other. Trust is lost.

Meddling with other people's physical bodies (cheating) not only leaves you marked aurically with that other person's DNA but you are physically merging three people's bodily fluids into one. The science of this is not seen in Mother Nature, ever. All we see if the merging of two compatible opposites, such as hydrogen and oxygen creating something brand new: water. Sodium and chlorine creating something brand new: table salt. The same takes place with us. You cannot create water by merging hydrogen, oxygen and peroxide - it simply won't work. In the same way, you cannot expect purity, trust and love when that is not why and how you're merging with another person.

Yet we try it all the time and then we wonder how come true love never seems to come our way!

The bible talks about us being virgins when we get married. Often we feel that we are serving a God who wants to punish us because he supposedly doesn't want us to enjoy physical pleasure by having sex with people. Little do we know that when two aurically pure beings merge for the first time and forever stay together, that we have two people that are aurically so bonded and pure that they can undertake anything they choose and they are energentically and in any other way supported by the laws of nature. Aurically pure couples are additionally protected by a special, non-penetrateable shield that most won't ever attain. They also don't have any cords that keep them from what's really important. It's not that God is a mean God, it's because God is a loving God that we're told to merge as virgins.

Now this may put a damper on most people because how many people do you know who are still virgins? So what are you to do if you're no longer a virgin?

There is a lot you can do; for one you can "go back" in time and cleanse yourself from the cords and energetic attachments of other people. You can decide to get a fresh start and to keep yourself from getting muddied even more and keep yourself clean and pure until you meet your Twin Soul. Work on yourself first and get yourself ready for that joyous reunion. Know that it will happen sooner than you think.

Most of all, forgive. Others as well as yourself for having merged with people you really didn't want to merge with in the first place, but did anyway. Perhaps you didn't have any control over it; set them free anway, let them go in peace and with forgiveness in your heart, wishing them only love and purity as well.

The Pain of Cheating

2008-12-13T17:05:00.000-08:00

There are always at least three "victims" when one person cheats on another.

1. The person who is being cheated on
2. The person whom is used to cheat on another
3. The person who does the cheating

When there are children involved, the children become victims too. Whether the cheating gets uncovered or not. Your friends get involved, they hurt for you. Your work suffers because you want to crawl up in a hole and die because the pain is so unbearable. And if the cheating takes enough breath from the people involved, entire groups of people and even entire communities and nations get affected (no need to remind us of the Clinton scandal).

But what happens when you ask the person to stop it because it hurts so much but he just won't stop (because the list of excuses is always the same)?

My Dad started an affair with his much younger secretary when I was 10 years old. Two years later it had blossomed to the kind of relationship he found it worth to leave his wife and two children for. He left and took my sister.

I remember feeling like he cheated on me, not my mother, but me personally. I never asked myself what I could have done differently to not have him leave; my Dad was weak and I never respected my Dad the way Dads deserve to be respected. And in a way I was glad his tyranny stopped. Dealing with my angry mother became a whole other world for me; one I didn't want to be part of anymore.

I was confused about whom I should be angry at: men for being cheating dogs and pigs or women for stealing married fathers from their little girls.

I decided to hate them both. And so I spent the next few years in hatred, which only caused me to get sick and sicker and sicker until I found myself on my death bed. To get the whole story you'll have to get the 6-hour audio program; it's a long story with a happy ending. For the sake of this post, let's just say that my father's cheating was not what hurt me, it was how he handled the situation after he came clean with it. People make mistakes and it takes two or three to cheat. Mistakes are to be forgiven. But what if someone continues to hurt you with the same pain over and over again even after you beg them to stop?

For years I swore to myself that I would never get married; I knew that I could never bare getting cheated on twice. When I met my future husband to be I changed my mind. He just didn't seem like the kind of guy that would cheat on me or anyone for that matter. And yet the first seven years of our marriage were spent in hell each time we had a fight. I was convinced that he would eventually cheat on me just like my father had, it was just a matter of time. I did so much injustice to my husband, and for that I'm so sorry. Lots of self-growth and therapy and after layers and layers of forgiveness spells I was able to let go of the hurt and pain from my Dad cheating and I also removed the burden from my husband.

Our marriage wasn't built on that solid stuff lasting marriages were supposed to be built on, and so it only lasted 14 years. But one thing my husband and I never did was cheat on each other. And for that I am eternally grateful.

And then I met a man I was utterly convinced was my Twin Soul. We were so intertwined and the same that it many ways it could be considered spooky. We even had body parts that showed identical markings, only on the other side. I had a mole on the left side of my face at the exact same spot where his was on the right side; even the mole looked the same. His right ankle was messed up, as was my left ankle. He had green dots in his eyes and I have yellow dots in my eyes. Our hands were shaped almost identical, only his were super sized. We even had obtained the almost identical injuries to our bodies over our life time. Experienced the same childhood stories in many ways, just amazing our lives as separate beings, yet so much the same. The most amazing thing was the way we could almost read each others' thoughts and feelings and the way we could feel each others' internal organs. I could feel his blood pressure and see his blood get pumped through his heart at certain intervals that painted a clear energetic picture for me, which in turn showed me his blood pressure as high or low. We could be standing or sitting hugging and as soon as his blood pressure would drop I could see it and feel it inside my own body. If I would wake up in the middle of the night, he would wake up at the same time and feel my anxiety, even though we were physically apart. It was simply amazing.

Yet no matter how much we felt that we were Twin Souls and how much we loved each other, he continued to cheat on me and so on himself and us.

I had never been cheated on, except by my father, and I remember the pain as if it was yesterday. The request to have this agony stop remained unheard, excuses came flowing in and nothing changed. Until the day my heart felt as though it broke to pieces. It was the day of our anniversary, when he cheated one last time. I could not take it anymore.

All my life I have lived my life as a "wall flower" in this department, like a good girl, a god-fearing woman, a one-man kind of woman, never having a one-night stand, wanting to serve my man whole heartedly, never allowing myself the space of unsafety, always caring for my soul with deep adoration and saving myself for the one Twin Soul. And yet I have made huge mistakes along the way and I have paid with much heartache as many others have. Why did I feel it necessary to muddy myself and letting myself be dipped in filth by a human being I had entrusted my fragile soul to this person? Most would call it blind faith, having those rose glasses on, love is blind, you know the drill. It was because of all the good we had in our relationship, it outweighed the cheating, at least so I told myself. But cheating hurts like hell, everyone who has ever been cheated on knows this first hand and you would like nothing more than to forget that nightmare. All you can think of and see if your beloved person being physically involved with that other person and it puts you on a downward spiral you can't seem to get out of; it's a nightmare you can't seem to wake up from.

For me it's the ultimate place of feeling unsafe, of having lost trust in this other person whom I have entrusted my soul in all its glory, as fragile as I was, only so he could drop it and trample it in the most defiling way possible. Some of you may not understand this, perhaps as I continue writing as the days and weeks and months go on, you will too.

Sometimes it takes a whole lot of pain from one person to another before we wake up. I had the opportunity to never get involved with this person, but because of how I felt it was my sincerest belief that this might just be my Twin Soul that I chose to get involved and gently dabble in what became an amazing journey otherwise. Filled with bliss, filled with agony because he wouldn't stop cheating.

Now looking back I am looking for hindsight to be my best friend - what was my lesson? Why did I let myself get treated so poorly?

Cheating is never okay, under no circumstances, and for no reason. If your spouse is no longer the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, then have the balls to leave her and keep your children in the holiness and dignity they deserve. I remember asking my mother why she stayed with my Dad when she didn't love him and she said: "Because of you and your sister."

I hated my mother for making us the glue to her unhappiness. At 12 years old I felt that she should have left him for the chance of finding someone else and get a chance at happiness. She said: "It was the 60s and I had 2 kids to support, not an easy time to find another man."

Bullshit all those excuses!

There are plenty of men who fall in love with pregnant women and are willing to adopt these children as theirs. There are plenty of great men out there! Making excuses is just another way of saying that you're weak and you don't deserve a chance at true love.

For those of you out there who have ever been cheated on - please stop being the martyr, you don't deserve to be cheated on, ever. There is never a good excuse or explanation. It's just plain wrong!

How can the person who claims to be your Twin Soul and love you so unconditionally get it on with somone else in the first place? Out of habit, out of duty, out of some sick and twisted responsibility? If he truly loved you and cared for you, all he would see is your hurt face while he's with someone else. That alone should make him rethink his actions. But obviously he's got a side to him that allows him to "tuck you away" until he's done with his most hurtful deed. Not much love there, if you ask me...

So feel your pain, own your part in it, let go of the anger eventually, and send the person who hurt you so much your blessings. Let them have the person they continue to cheat with, and wish them well, while you look on to grow from this and get ready for the true Twin Soul who would never hurt you in such a way. No matter how much it breaks your heart to move on. Your heart will heal in due time. For now let it be, let them go, and put your focus on you once again. Be gentle with yourself and love yourself first and foremost and swear to yourself to never let yourself be dragged through the mud in such a terrible way again.

Because no one deserves to feel so much torture and agony - no one.

When Your Heart Deceives You

2008-12-12T07:28:00.000-08:00

Most of us have heard the scripture: "The heart is deceitful above all things."

How often (or not) has someone come along and you were sure that this must be "the one," only for you to find out that your heart was playing tricks on you. We are a gullible people, most of us, because that little void within us all is reserved for that one special person who is the only one to fill that void. And how we long to fill that void; so when love hits us, or at least we think it's love, then of course we want that person to be "the one," the one to fill the void, the one to call us home, the one to help us rest in timeless suspension.

But what if the person you thought was "the one" is only another relationship to prepare you for the real deal? How will you know that this was not the one?

It would be nice to be awake and conscious enough to "get it" right away. Because Life knows the signs and symbols and red flags are all there right from the get-go. What's in the way are those pink glasses we seem to see everything through. It's as if we have to get hurt over and over again until those glasses get knocked off and we can see clearly again that we get back on the right track.

Here is a simple rule of thumb to knowing if the person you're dealing with is "the one" or just another relationship in preparation of "the one."

If s/he does something and you express that this hurts you, and s/he continues to do them - s/he is NOT the one. No matter what the circumstances, no matter the excuses, no matter the plan, your beloved Twin Soul simply doesn't have it in him or her to hurt you because in doing so, s/he would only hurt him/herself, which would contradict his or her very essence.

Above all, love yourself with dignity, integrity, unconditionally and be gentle with yourself. Don't hurt yourself and certainly don't let anyone else hurt you either. Love should never hurt even for a split second but should be a stronghold for people to come to for nourishment and safety.

Ask and You Shall Receive

2008-12-09T12:14:00.001-08:00

Waiting and preparing a space for our Twin Soul takes energy, effort and a tremendous amount of desire. As everything goes and comes in cycles and rhythms, I too can feel the rhythms of desire for him stronger at times, and weaker at other times. Life gets in the way and distratctions serve to lead me off the path of wanting and desiring to be with my Twin Soul. Perhaps others feel the same as they go about life. Before you know it, evening time is here, it's dark and you feel like retracting, cuddling up on the coach while reading a book and sipping on tea. Then you realize that the bulk of your day went to your employer to making him or her wealthy, and little was done to build your own character and focus on your life instead. The same goes for just another year that has passed. Think about it, we're about to close off 2008. Another year where our Twin Soul has delayed...

So how can we foster and nurture this desire deep within? I often go to Walter Russell's books, and especially to the Divine Iliad, where it states:

"Seek ye, therefore, what ye will in Me and ye shall find it."

"But sit ye not and ask, acting not, for thy desire will not come to thee unaided by thine own strong arms."

I love the analogy of a seasaw. The fulcrum is the power, the desire is in the children wanting to make the seasaw swing. Nothing happens until the two children give it a go (and they put action behind their desire). The actual power of the seasaw, however, is in the fulcrum, the place that remains still. So it is with God and our desire. God (or Light) is our still fulcrum from where we get all of our power and inspiration and even a roadmap of how to make our desires a reality. So the power is here, we are co-creators with God to create ANYTHING we so desire. And yet, nothing happens if I don't back up my desire and take advantage of the power given me, and I don't bring to fruition the desire by the actions I take.

"What actions can I take to bring this Twin Soul into my life?" you might ask.

It's really simple. Live as if s/he is already in your life, pretend that s/he is already there living with you, coming home to you every day, and before you know it, s/he will be there. Prepare your place of living as if your Twin Soul is coming home every night, make it pleasant, inviting and romantic, make it sacred and holy and keep it that way. Don't meddle with "friends with benefits" just to "hold you over." Doing so will only keep him or her from coming to you. Keep your place sacred, keep your heart and your soul sacred by tuning into him or her frequently throughout the day. Write cards and letters, especially now during the holidays and Valentine's day is just around the corner. Date them and put them in a special box for when you can hand them over in real life. Put energy into your relationship "as if" your Twin Soul is already here.

Walk about your day with him/her by your side (energetically speaking). When you think about him or her, smile, let others see that you're in love with your Twin Soul. That you're taken and occupied by a special love that only you and your Twin Soul can complete. BELIEVE that s/he exists at this time. It's only a matter of time until you see his or her face...

Happy Birthday Wishes

2008-12-06T09:20:00.000-08:00

I am elated that after 46 birthdays, our paths finally cross to celebrate your 47th. In many ways I feel as though it’s my birthday today too. Perhaps we’re blessed enough to celebrate your next 46 birthdays together.

I have felt the honor of having been in your presence these past few months, having watched you change and grow in a direction that is calling me higher as a woman. You’ve allowed me to surrender to my feminine. When I get scared you step in and hold my soul, allowing me to feel safe in my “weak” and vulnerable space. You have allowed me to feel ways that I have never felt before. Feelings that go beyond ecstasy and reach past the edges of the Universe. With you I feel as though we visit a time and place in the big nowhere, where time and space disappear and we rest in suspension. No matter what the future holds, I thank you for the glimpses of heaven...

Thank you for the path you are taking and for having chosen to walk a bit of this life journey with me. When thinking of the perfect gift to give to the man who has brought out the most feminine in me, I have to admit that no worldly gift will ever come close enough to express my gratitude.

You can wish for anything you want. I anchor and bless all of your wishes of light and pray that you would seize the opportunity for manifesting whatever it is you want. I wish you strength and courage to go after your dreams; tenacity and endurance to keep going when things get tough; pure vision and hearing to see beyond these earthly borders; love, compassion, kindness and humility to always give gifts of heaven to others; strength of character to protect and nurture your dreams; understanding and detachment so not to control the menial and faith and trust to know that everything is always as it should be…

I wish that all of your ideals, dreams and wishes will manifest in the most peaceful and fun ways.

Happy Birthday!

A Prayer for Me (and all Women)

2008-12-01T14:54:00.000-08:00

Like the trees of our world - I shall surrender, be, remain solid and steady, beautiful, lush, full of colors, carry fruits, flowers and leafs, with roots as deep as the earth, spreading from within, upward to heaven, outward as if to hug the world, providing shelter and shade to those who come, and safety, yet never holding on to anything or anyone, not even her own fruit and leafs. Never chasing my husband, the wind, but letting him come to me...Never to get his job and my job confused; let him chase after me and ruffle my leafs and shake my branches so my fruit can fall, die and multiply. It's my job to sway according to the strength and guidance of his leadership, whether he sways me hard or gently - my job is to be led by him, to never refuse his leadership, his pressure, his gentleness, and not to hold on to him, complain about this leadership or to try to lead him in another direction than where he wants to go. I am working on me, my strength, my flexibility and limberness, my yielding, my surrender. And in due time and when he is ready, he shall return.

Women and Trees and the Wind

2008-11-30T20:45:00.000-08:00

And my quest for my Twin Soul continues, and so do the lessons. I had mentioned that one of my requests to the Universe is the gift of detachment, of letting go and giving up control. It's a tall order and a powerful request and already I am being given opportunities to practice detachment (perhaps more than I bargained for).

Today I talked to a friend and out came the words: "I've let go of the outcome and am just moving on and forward with my life." I am realizing that I think and say these words more than I ever have, and it's because detachment from things and people, even life itself, is very dear to my heart. Above all I want peace and freedom. Most might ask what the heck is wrong with me wanting to let go of life and people and circumstances. The truth is that our bodies and this life doesn't really exist on the same plane as does our light source from which we came from and to which we are returning to. In other words, this life and everything you see is an illusion serving the great divine purpose for us to get reunited at the mountain top. I want to get to that mountain top rather than lingering here in the jungle, walking this evolutionary journey as a non-conscious individual being. I'm part of the whole, a fragment of you, if you will.

Giving up control to any outcome is a scary thing because after all, it's kind of what we're all about on this worldly plane. We start companies to have success, not to "let go of the outcome." We start relationships so we can "hold on" to the partnership. We exercise so we can be healthy, not so we can let go of health. It's a tricky thing to explain what I mean by "detachment." But I shall give it a try nonetheless.

A tree is feminine, with roots deep and wide into the soil, holding her down, letting her stand straight and firm. The wind is male, and comes to ruffle her leaves on a daily basis. Sometimes harder than other times. We've never seen a tree's branches reach out and trying to grab on to the wind, kind of like saying: "You stay here, I'm not gonna let you go!" It doesn't work this way in nature. Feminine and masculine work together in unison and synchronicity, and exclusive trust that can only be described as divine. Yet in relationships and life in general, we refuse to "let go" of the order of things, we want to hold back people because we want them in our lives.

The clearest example is that of funerals. Most people cry because they have lost a person. In there lies the key, THEY have lost the person. They cry for selfish reasons really. Because most people don't have a clue of where the deceased person is or how that person is "feeling" on the other plane. In other words, we have a hard time letting go even of death. We refuse to work with Life and accept life and death as an inseparable team. We love life, we hate death. It's when we get to love both the same that we have made major strides to walking a higher evolutionary journey. This also includes letting go of peope who are not meant to be in our lives, as friends, family members or our life partners.

As a woman who wants to learn how to detach myself from the outcome of finding and reuniting with my Twin Soul I have to look to Nature to finding the examples there. I certainly can't look in any magazine to tell me how I should be as a woman, I would miserably fail. Nature has something down that we as humans seem to screw up because we interfere too much with our egos, rather than living from within. With our male and analytical brain we overrule the deep and mysterious, only to find that we become jagged and hard and stubborn. As a woman, however, I am dedicated to being "all woman" through and through. And it's one of the easiest and also one of the hardest things I've ever done.

I am not physically attached to my Twin Soul like Siamese Twins are, and so I walk as a seeming separate being, seemingly responsible for just myself, working and earning money (masculine side) and walking my evolutionary path dedicated to "going home" to our light source (feminine quality). And yet, energetically speaking I am very much attached and united with my Twin Soul, even though he's not occupying my physical space as of yet. So it's about bridging the gap between now and then, and doing so in the truest sense of my essence, which is feminine.

As a single woman I have a responsibility to my Twin Soul to work on my femininity, not to foster and grow his masculine essence. In doing so I would only keep him farther apart. The question is, how can I as a stand-alone and single woman treasure and increase my feminine essence, the round aspect of my being, and prepare a space for his arrival while still taking care of "his functions" while I living life?

This post may be confusing to some, because it may not make sense to you, and that's okay. It will make sense to my Twin Soul. I am dedicated to working on my feminine essence, on being like a solid tree, letting you ruffle my leaves with your gentle caresses, while standing strong in Mother Earth, and allowing you to fully penetrate my every branch and leaf with your soft massaging attempts to wow me.

I may need more help in the surrendering process than I'd like to admit. So I am putting it out there into the Universe: please forgive me if I take over leadership, if I tell you how to walk your path and how to pave our journey ahead of us. It's not my job, I am fully aware. My job is to BE, your job is to DO. When I fail, know that I long to "just be" and that perhaps I take over your responsibilities because I don't see your actions keeping us safe. I may push and test you unconsciously, to see if you'll break. Because if you falter and crumble and shrivel under my pushing, the world certainly will crush you. Above all I want to BE, just BE, and I can only BE and detach and surrender to you completely, if I know that you will not let us be crushed by the world. So please stand up to me. When I push don't falter but open me up to your love instead. MAKE ME trust you by lovingly opening me to your leadership. The sun and wind are your teachers (and mine) and the moon and trees are mine (and yours). Above all, lead me with actions more than with your words...

The Wish List Game

2008-11-29T14:45:00.000-08:00

If you watched my "Saying Good Bye" movie (to the left) then you've seen a grocery cart full of wrapped gifts with the sub title: "Place your request with the Universe. Give gifts of Heaven and the World shall be yours."

I heard an amazing story a long time ago, it stuck with me and from it I came up with the Wish List Game. The story goes like this:

Imagine yourself being welcomed by your angel as you arrive in heaven. "Follow me, I'll show you to your room," said your angel. You follow this looooong hallway with doors to the left and right, all with names on them. Your angels stops in front of the door with your name on it. You open the door and inside is the biggest, most beautiful and most magnificent room you have ever seen. It is filled with wrapped gifts as far as as your eyes can see, from top to bottom, wrapped gifts everywhere. In the middle of the room you see a few gifts that had been unwrapped. "What are those," you ask your angel. "Those are the things you asked for, the wrapped gifts are the things you could have had, if you just had asked for them."

The moral of the story is that the Universe truly does want to bless us, we just need to ask for it.

You can play this game by yourself, with a pen and paper. Even better is playing with a friend who has the same understanding of the Universal powers as you do, a friend who loves you no matter what, who won't judge you if you're asking for the dumbest and smallest or weirdest things, because he or she knows there is no such things. This person has the power to anchor your gifts by not only holding your space for you, but by asking for the same gift as well.

Personally I think gifts that are given are ten-thousand times more gratifying than the gifts that we receive. If you're angry or hold grudges you may ask for gifts of being giving or the gift of forgiveness. So make sure you also ask for gifts that you can give to others. Such as kindness and mercy to others, forgiveness when a friend hurts you, etc. I call these gifts of heaven. Their the best kind.

I played this game with a friend this morning. We were on the phone for about 2 hours. Here is how it went. He made a wish and then I sealed it by saying: "Your wish is my command." You can also say "And you shall have it." All of the gifts we asked for were anchored by the other, so I would say: "Your wish is my command and I wish the same thing as well."

There are no rules except not to judge for whatever the other person is requesting and having tons of fun, laugh about it and FEEL the joy of the gift now as if it was already here. At one point I asked to always have the ability to fall in love with the tiniest, littlest thing, which is to keep me living in the Now. He anchored this by wishing that he wished to always see the uniqueness of a beautiful tree or notice a special rose that would stick out from all the other roses on the rosebush. There are no limits to this game. Get as detailed as you want (the more detailed the better).

Here is where it got interesting. After the most important or shall I say, most obvious gift requests, such as happiness, true love, health, wealth, friends of integrity, etc., we started to "run out of" things to ask for. We quickly realized why this room full of wrapped gifts only has a few unwrapped gifts in the middle. We just don't ask! We run out of things to ask because we think "it's too good to be true," or "I better not ask for too much so I won't get disappointed." Whatever the reason, we don't believe...

To demonstrate the power of this game, here is what happened to me within literally 30 minutes of hanging up with my friend. Here are 3 sample wishes that I had made throughout the course of these 2 hours:

1. I want to always enjoy smooth technology, computers, vehicles, no issues with roofs, plumbing and so on. I put this request out because my car just needed $2000 worth of repairs and was in the shop for 2.5 weeks, it had been stolen.

2. Another request was that I want to focus on detachment, letting go, not feeling the need to control every outcome but to enjoy peace and the silent knowing that everything always happens for a reason.

3. Another request was to enjoy enough money to always pay for what needs to be paid for and to enjoy a life style that would allow me to be free to be about purpose, go travel for 3 months or a year if I chose to. I asked for passive income in particular.

We really enjoyed this entire process, thanked each other for being the catalyst for each other's life dreams and then hung up the phone. I got in my gym clothes and jumped in the car only to find that my "check engine" light came on.

"You've gotta be kidding!" I told myself.

Ah! Remember I asked for smooth technology? I asked for working technology because I had just gone through this car ordeal. Do you think I was probably making this request more out of fear or out of peace?

So another request I had made was to exercise detachment, letting go, being at peace.

So I had a choice to make, would I take responsibility for having made the wish out of fear and then having an attitude about the "check engine" light or would I take the opportunity and give myself the gift of detachment, letting it go and enjoying peace knowing that dream number 3, having enough money would shortly follow thereafter?

Yes, I chose to let it go and be at peace about it. Some of you may be tempted to say that the bad always happens but the money to fix the car would probably be withheld. This happens when we get an attitude about it and thus we clip off the law of allowance, thus the Universe can't deliver the money because we are no longer in alignment with the gift of always having plenty (because we're now certain that the money will surely be withheld, the Universe has to bring you this new request instead and cancel out the old gift request).

And I realized that we are amazing creators - if we just believed, took some courage and truly went out to the edge and were bold to ask for whatever we want! It took 30 minutes for me to get the gift of detachment (and yes, it's an ongoing gift and I'm sure more opportunities to practice this gift are just around the corner).

The most important thing here is to ask out of love, not out of fear. But first, you must ask - THEN you will receive!

Happy Wish List Game everyone.

Sex, Purity and Twin Souls

2008-11-28T19:31:00.000-08:00

I could talk and write for days about the science of what takes place when two people merge their bodies. A blog entry might not leave enough room to get to the real depth of the urgency and importance of keeping yourself and your union clean at any cost and at all times.

Sleeping around "while you're waiting" for the one only causes your loved one to stay away even longer. The energy of the people you're sleeping with "while you're waiting" is holding your beloved at bay. You may wonder how s/he can even know if you're not with them. Trust me, not everything you see is what it seems to be. In fact, everything you can see with your eyes in an illusion. This is a world of duality, there are "two lights" that seemingly create what we see with our human eyes. That's why we're told to open our inner eyes and inner ears. It's with those eyes and ears that we can see and hear the truth, not our truth, but THE truth. There is a piece of your soul that just "knows" intuitively. Your Twin Soul is not geared by what they see or feel, they just know... Just like you know that s/he is the one for you or not. You can't explain it, you just know. It's this knowing that is Universal knowledge, you can't fight it, or change it for that matter. Trust in it. You want him or her to come to you and wonder how come he hasn't arrived yet? In this post is your answer...

We were told (mainly through religious organizations) that it is "wrong" to have sex before marriage and we somehow are meant to believe that we're sluts and hores (if you're a woman) if you have sex before you're getting married, and you're a stud (the more you have sex) if you're a guy. The picture is twisted, misunderstood and only a handfull seem to truly understand what takes place when two people merge their bodies.

First, remember that humans are amongst the only species that have sex beyond the reason for multiplication. Most other species mate for the sole purpose of keeping the species alive. Keep this in mind.

So why do humans want to make love when they are in love with a person?

Plainly put, making love with another person while using our bodies is the highest form of expressing how much we want to literally become ONE with that person. The real reason for our wanting to merge is to "go home" to eternity, even if only for a moment in time. It's this "small moment in time" of utter and complete union in true and unconditional love that raises the vibration of the entire human race, provided the union is just that: pure, holy and sacred.

Unfortunately most people don't even know about this type of power yet between two people, let alone experience it in this life time, thus they use sex as a form of stress relief rather than what it was really meant to be.

The opposite is true as well. Two people who merge merely as a form of lust, stress release or even with malice in their hearts, achieve the exact opposite. The same goes if you're just "doing it" because it's become a habit. Not only are you feeling disgust, filth and dirt all over your soul, but the vibration of the entire human race gets reduced just a fraction.

You may say "that's a bunch of bull shit." And that's probably right for you, however, having read this your life will most likely never be the same. Somehow you were led to read this, your soul must have longed to hear it once again. There is nothing new here, it's all been inside of you for the awakening...

The best things in life can't be explained, they can't be paid for or worked for, they can't be achieved and they don't have to be won, they can't be taken and they can't be received. Making love with your Twin Soul is pure magic, it "just is" and it is the most sacred, most holy and most selfless act you can do for humanity - PROVIDED you do it with the one beloved Twin Soul.

So back to virginity and sleeping with people for the "wrong" reasons. The reason the bible talks about virginity is not because "God" is an evil entity that wants us to practice celebacy or refrain from recharging our batteries. On the contrary. We must recharge our batteries but consider this:

A tripple AAA battery gets hooked up with a double AA battery and we're trying to charge this piece of equipment. It simply won't work. What oscillates between the two batteries is different from each other. The piece of equipment won't get recharged and might perhaps even get destroyed, and the batteries will get drained nonetheless, having achieved absolutely nothing.

The same thing happens with two people that have no business of being together, neither physically nor in life. What oscillates in our very veins is life blood, or pure light source energy. Your frequency and vibration is completley different from mine. Finding your other half will reunite you with your own lifeblood and equal energy. Being with the wrong partner drains not only at least one of the partners, it will destroy, postpone and delay what you've come to this planet to do. Making love provides a few moments of time in space where time and space literally disappear. It's called the zero point where pure suspension from existence reign. It's the moment in time you feel like you're the other person, the other person is you, your bodies are one, you have no idea where his body starts and your ends, you don't know what time it is, if you're alive or dead, you don't even know what the difference is between life and death and you realize there is no difference, no separation. You are in absolute bliss.

You can only achieve this state of bliss with a true soul mate or Twin Soul.

Everything else is pure lust (and thus destructive, no matter how good it feels temporarily).

Let's look at the realistic and uncomfortable fact that many men like young women, preferrably virgins. Why is this so? Think about it. Virgins have an aura that is pure, untouched and untainted by other people's energy. Their clean and pure auric field promises these men to "take them home" to this blissful state. The "garbage," or shall I say baggage, and tainted negative energy of other men has not yet negatively colored these girls (yet).

On the other hand, take a prostitute. Many men refuse to be with a prostitute for this same reason. She's been tainted and used and possibly abused by the energy of so many men, many of whom are only interested in "busting a nut" or seeking relief for their stress levels. It's a most selfish act to say the least, and a most self-destructive one as well. A clean, strong and ethical and self secure man will abstain under any cost to be merged with someone of that type of auric field because he knows that merging with such a "battery" his own battery will not get recharged, it will get drained, which will cost him dearly in many other ways related to character.

So what if she's only giving you a blow job, you may wonder? It doesn't matter what the act is. Don't try to come up with every excuse you can think of to justify lust. Call it what it is. You are in a person's auric field the moment you lock eyes with them or stand close to them. You don't even have to touch them and you're energies merge. Intercourse certainly is like multiplying that energetic charge, it's like going 200 miles an hour, rather than just having started the car. Both, however, are acts of energy-exchanges.

Next time you think about making love with someone, make sure the person is your Twin Soul. If not, find ways to transmute your desire into your soon-to-arrive Twin Soul through meditation and allowing your flow of energy to go elsewhere, perhaps a good cause, exercise, writing, whatever allows you to recharge your battery in other, non-sexual ways.

Keep yourself pure, hold yourself in sacredness and holiness, because you deserve to be "clean" and prepared and untainted for the "one and only."

Saying Good Bye

2008-11-27T14:20:00.000-08:00

Sometimes we have to say goodbye to the ones we love. We feel as though life has come to an abrupt halt. We can't function, can't think, can't do the simplest things in life, forget to even brush our teeth. It's okay - be gentle with yourself, take your time and in due time you will find your path again. Watch this video for inspiration and motivation.

Hard Women

2008-11-24T17:36:00.000-08:00

After my last post about the sun and moon, something interesting opened up in me. It's nothing new to me that I should write about something and before I know it, more of the same topic suddenly surrounds me with plenty of examples to feed on and grow by. We live in an amazing Universe.

I talked about women who become hard and start to show "jagged" lines in their facial maps when they turn into "men" and start taking reigns into their own hands. I seem to know this better than anyone, having grown up with a father who was disappointed that I wasn't born a boy. While I loved hanging out with the boys and seemed to have a lot more in common with them when growing up, it's as if I was screaming at the Universe: "More of this please!" and the Universe submissively obliged by saying: "Your wish is my command."

By the time I was 12 my father and sister moved out, leaving my mother to work 6 days a week, 12 hour days. She had a hard time making ends meet. I had to find my own job and pay for my own clothes, which I bought at Salvation Army, and pay for my own food. I was my own breadwinner way too early on in life. And while it gave me some freedom to feel independent and self-sufficient, it was a struggle. My mother did a "good job" teaching me that everyone was, or at least should, live in scarcity mode and be a minimalist. I learned to reuse everything, including sowing together the holes at the bottom of my feet and using completely worn out clothes to patch holes and tears on my favorite jeans. I never heard of the concept that a "prince and knight in shining armor" would one day come and "rescue me." I wasn't broken, I wasn't threatened and I didn't need rescuing, least of all from myself. And for that I am grateful to this day.

Growing up like this I learned to do things from scratch, everything from bread, salad dressing, jam, I even made mayonnaise from scratch. I planted my own flowers in the garden, rather than buying them in a store. It was a very feminine time at the same time as it was a very masculine time.

Over the years however, I am realizing, from looking at my own facial map, that I dabbled way too much in the masculine area of life, foresaking my feminine essence. A couple of years ago I felt as though I needed to do something "feminine" for myself and I joined a belly dance studio and paid for one full month, which allowed me to take as many belly dance classes as I wanted to. I went 4 times a week and boy was I surprised to discover that my limber body was completely out of balance. First of all, I'm pretty flexible, do the splits and purposefully keep myself that way because I've lost use of my body before and appreciate my body immensly. So I thought shaking my hips would be a slam-dunk experience for me. I could shake it up pretty good on the right side but when it came time for my left side to follow along I was suprised to find my left side to almost "foreign" to me.

For those of you who don't know this, the right side of your brain, your intuitive side (moon side) is responsible for the left side of your body, which also relates to your mother or your feminine side in general. The left side of your brain consequently is your analytical, masculine side and is responsible for your right side of your body, you father's side, your strong side. Injuries to your left side of your body are often related to your feminine side, mother side, etc. Right side injuries are related to your masculine side, father side. Etc. It's pretty intuitive from here on out...

So my left side, mother and feminine side, was completely locked up and stiff and wouldn't swing and raddle to this sensual belly dance music at all. I was suprised to not only see the difference in the mirror, I was especially shocked at the way my left side felt. It felt as if the left side of my body didn't belong to me.

It made me sad at first, then I realized how much I had let the "little girl" in me be neglected, and it spurred me on to do more for this feminine side of mine. I stuck with the belly dance classes and decided to take a jewelry making class. I learned how to design from the right side of my brain and put my design on a piece of paper, saw brass and silver and create a beautiful piece of art (I designed two interlocking hearts that were joined by a crown). Then I took a precious metal clay class where I learned how to make silver earrings and other intricate designs. These experiences were very different from my upbringing and farm life.

This year I decided to take my "practice in femininity" to the next level and allow my feminine to be led, truly led by a man. I couldn't think of anything better than to take some Salsa classes. Not because I wanted to be a professional ballroom dancer, but because I knew that being led on a dance floor must be my ultimate challenge. Having been such a leader of my own life, my own finances and even screwing up my marriage because I constantly wore the pants, I knew taking partner-dancing would be my ultimate challenge (besides being in a relationship of course).

And I'm proud to announce that I did great. In fact one guy told me that approximately 20% of all women know even remotely how to follow and of the same 20% I probably belong to the top 1 or 2%. That made me feel really good!

I'm ready for the ultimate balancing act now: the relationship!

Well, so I thought at least. I'm learning, as you will too, that being ready to be in that one special Twin Soul relationship does take two to make the yin-yang complete. So where is my Twin Soul? Where is my special beloved and why has he not heard my call yet? What is it in me that repels him? What scares him off or keeps him away?

I know in the end the journey that seems to look completed once we have found this other person, will only lead us right back to ourselves. In other words, I'm not looking to be made complete, because I'm already complete. I am looking for the ultimate place of balance, the ultimate place of zero, of stillness where time and space disappear, where bodies disolve into nothingness and where we can die a mini-death that can only be described as divine.

And so I'm learning and realizing about myself that when I want something, I want it now. Actually, I want it yesterday. Patience is a virtue and therefore feminine. Impatience is masculine. It's like a tree (feminine) who stands firm on her roots, waiting patiently for her partner, the wind, to come and ruffles her leaves. She knows that he'll come, without a doubt he'll come.

Likewise, my beloved, I shall wait for the one who is available and ready, because he hears not only my calling, he hears his own calling within his own heart. It's like the Native American said in my dream last night as I was hugging him:

"The drums of your heart are transporting me home before many lifetimes when we were one."

The Sun and the Moon - Perfect Leader, Perfect Surrender

2008-11-22T11:59:00.000-08:00

On a constant, exiting and exhilirating journey to finding my own Self in my relationship with my true Twin Soul, I am left to working on myself. The visions continue pouring in, the journey continues getting more and more full with guidance, milestones and tremendous insights from what seems legions of helpers.

Relationships are meant to be so easy if we just watched and followed our examples of Mother Nature. Yes I know, it's easier said than done - but truly, if we were to look more, feel more, and be more, and talk a whole lot less, than all our questions would be answered and not only that, but we would also be given the steps of HOW and WHAT to do next.

Let's look at our biggest examples. They're so big they're in our face every day. Yet we seem to miss them all together because we've never stopped long enough to "get it" and soak them in. And because we've gotten used to them. So here it is. Soak it in, think about it, meditate about it, watch them, and let them do the work inside of you, and you're off into a whole new direction in life.

What am I talking about?

The sun and the moon. Male and Female. Our perfect examples.

The sun is masculine, the moon is feminine.
The sun radiates, the moon contracts and takes in, she absorbs.
The sun is light, the moon is dark.
The sun initiates, the moon receives (and regives the sun's light in equal measures back to him).
The sun is much farther away from their "child," planet Earth, the moon always circles around her "child" and protects it.
The sun never tires and never withholds his rays under any circumstances.
Even when the moon seems to hide her face or hide behind her child, the sun continues shining his rays in complete trust that eventually she will come forward again and show her full face.
Likewise the moon trusts that when she's ready to show her full face again, he's there shining on her in his full leadership.
He always pursues her, he never tires of pursueing and chasing after her, even when she hides behind their "child" he continues pursuing her, knowing full well that she'll always reflect back his amazing glory in due time.
He never ceases to trust in his leadership and his mission.
While the sun is simple and steady, she has her rhythms and they both allow each other their purposes.
Never for a second do either one of them leave their galactic path; they're a team and they stay on course.

Sounds pretty simple doesn't it? It is!

Imagine the sun having an attitude because she's on her "cycle" and is hiding from him, so he decides to stop pursuing her, and stops shining his light on her. Imagine if she decided to hop over to another galaxy, abandoning their union and their "child" planet Earth, while she's off duty getting light from another galaxy's sun. We'd have a cosmic disaster.

Granted, no one probably ever thought of it this way because we've come to blindly trust that the sun always comes up, and always shines. We know the moon changes our attitudes during a full moon and we are googly-eyed over her full face over a beautiful lake and we feel her magic and yet what we're really looking at during a full moon is a reflection of HIS light.

All a great woman ever does is hold his space and reflect what he first gives her (and it should be nothing but warmth, light and leadership in which she can trust).

In other words, a great leader is always reflected in his woman's face (as is a leader that withholds his leadership). You can always tell when a woman radiates and when she's in pain. It never fails to be traced back to the masculine somehow. And I'm not saying this to point the finger at men when your woman is sad. I am saying it to highlight and underline the tremendous power you, as the male, have over any woman. Do you realize, truly realize that your power is all that matters on this planet? And that your woman's ability to hold your power, surrender to you and reflect back your power to you is what closes the circle of life and completes life??

But what if the woman is simply disconnected or absent and too numb or dull to even feel his rays, let alone reflect them back to him? It's called a lifetime of disappointment and a lack of chance to ever be able to surrender into her man fully...Do you as a woman even know what it feels like and looks like to be be completely surrendered where time and space and even the edges of your body completely disappear and disolve into your sun?

I'm learning that in order for the moon to be receptive of his full light, she must first of all be present. She must be willing to trust his leadership and she must never pursue him because she knows that is his job, not hers. In today's world where the feminine movement is teaching women to take over "male roles" and to give instructions to employees, both men and women, we have become depolarized and de-feminized (if that's even a word). There's nothing wrong with having a powerful position in business, provided the woman doesn't become a man internally at her core. I find that most CEO women's first act of faith is to chop off their hair and to wear suits like men do. Why...

Having grown up developing my masculine essence to the "t," I know how hard it is now for me to give over the reigns to the masculine. And I don't mean the masculine within me, but the masculine in a man. I find that most men are "pussy-whipped" and they're confused as to what a true leader's role is. I find nothing more repulsive than a man who doesn't know his purpose and doesn't follow his true calling. And likewise, I find nothing more miraculous and attractive than a man who knows his purpose and follows it wholeheartedly, with a "no matter what" attitude. Such a man I can follow, such a man I can trust, such a man I know I can't push around and not that I'm looking to push my man around, but I need to know more than anything that he can stand up for himself, his purpose and most of all, for what is right (in spite of me). Only then can I truly surrender and be all woman and give up control and give up the reigns and do what I do best: be a woman who reflects back to him what he first gave me - his unconditional leadership and love to his mission, which includes me.

Where to find such a man?

I'm realizing that it's not about finding him as much as it is recognizing him and most of all, letting him find me and recognize me. I'm realizing that it's not my job to chase after him. It's his job to chase after me...He'll know when he sees me and feels my essence. He will be relentless in his pursuit of me because he knows that I am part of his mission because I make his mission easier by helping him multiply his rays (by reflecting his own love back to him).

Is your Moon truly out there?

I also realize that men reading this may wonder if their "moon" is truly out there. It's a scientific and astronomical fact that all planets and moons are born of Suns. What this means is that your seed was here first. Therefore, your moon must be "out there." It can't be otherwise. But before finding her "out there" you must find her "in here." Remember, she was born of you, so you had her at one point. In fact, she never left you, it only appears this way. First recognize her within you, call her within you. All you need to do to "find her again" is to decide that you're the leader, man up about ALL areas of your life and be about YOUR purpose. Shine, shine, and shine some more. And before you know it you will recognize her in front of you because what you are recognizing is in reality your Self.

Is your Sun truly out there?

As far as women is concerned. You were born of your Sun and he's obviously shining out there "somewhere." Likewise you're just hiding your face, in an eclipse type of mode, so you can't even see that he's looking for you. Be your Self, go inward, recognize him there first, be the "dark" and mysterious that you are and find his light there first. Be all woman, all feminine. Stop playing the role of your man. Yes, if you're single and a single Mom at that, you must continue working and paying your bills and being father and mother all at the same time. That's okay, just play your feminine parts that way: all feminine! Start treating yourself like the woman you want to feel like; the way you want your man to treat you. Call him through your actions of how you treat yourself first. Surrender to his light now, even though he doesn't seem to be in the picture as of yet, and before you know it, you'll recognize his light from within and your reunion will be the joyous event that it is meant to be.

True Femininity

2008-11-21T17:03:00.000-08:00

What does true femininity mean? Many may point out a sensual woman, an actress like Sophia Loren or Marilyn Monroe. A woman who is curvy, voluptous and carries it well. One of my personal favorites is Jennifer Love Hewett - very feminine indeed. Femininity however goes truly beyong looks and an hour-glass figure. And then of course we have those that are so screwed up that they think anorexia is feminine (see photo below).

True femininity as in the opposite of masculinity, however, is something completely different all together. We all feature mascule and feminine sides and attributes, as it should be. And as a society we try to figure out what the "male species" and the "female species" is all about.

In Feng Shui things that are pointed or cornered are always male. Things that are round or wavy are always feminine. It's pretty simple and straight forward.

David Deida describes it this way: "If a man has a masculine sexual essence, then his priority is his mission, his direction towards the greater release, freedom, and consciousness. If a woman has a feminine sexual essence, then her priority is the flow of love in her life, including her relationship with a man whom she can totally trust, in body, emotion, mind, and spirit."

He goes on saying: "Your woman's core is fulfilled by love. Your core (the man's core) is released from stress by aligning your life with your mission. To you, intimacy is something to be enjoyed in addition to your purpose. To your woman, intimacy is at the core of her life, and the tone of your intimacy colors everything else she does."

"You (the man) are lodged in the heart of your woman. She feels you all day. She senses where you are at. Feeling-threads from her heart are connected to your heart, day and night. You are not replaceable in her perception."

He continues saying: "Without a deep and loving intimacy - with you or with the divine - she hurts. It will never work for her to try to quell the pain by absorbing herself in her career, her art, or her friends. If she has a feminine essence, she must honor herself by owning her deep desire for the flow of love in her heart, just as a person with a masculine essence must honor his or her direction in order to be truly happy."

And my favorite part saying it in plain English: "If one of your highest goals is psychological or spiritual reedom, then you will highly value your intimacy. Nobody will press your buttons or reflect your asshole to you better than your woman. She will point out your weaknesses better than a boot camp drill sergeant. She will reflect your ambiguity or clarity better than any workshop teacher. She will do you better than a whore and give you more loving than you can handle. And all the while she will shower your life with radiant blessing, healing, and enlivenment - if she learns to own her true feminine desires and you learn to own your true masculine desires."

I can't add to these words because they speak so true of how differently men and women function. Granted, we all have masculine and feminine tendencies. There is a core in each of us, however. And for me as a woman, my core needs to be "all woman." A difficult task for me because my Dad wished I was born a boy. He treated me like a boy most of my childhood and I didn't accept that I was a girl until I was 10 years old, long after I was enrolled in soccer, rugby, ice hockey and I came home dirty every night trying to catch frogs and crickets with the boys. I was a tomboy to say the least.

Femininity is new to me. Well, shall I say it's a new realization for me. It obviously has always been there (no sex change here, I'm all woman indeed). And at times I realize how powerful this feminine source is and I'm learning slowly but surely to stay in the feminine rather than hopping over to the masculine where it's much more comfortable (because it's so much simpler).

The masculine is black or white, up or down, yes or no - not much drama here.

The feminine seems to flow left, right, up, down, inside and out - how couldn't anyone get confused with all these directions! No wonder men are confused and never know what to expect!

So while I am waiting for you, my beloved Twin Soul, I shall have a lot of work to do finding my comfort zone in this wild, wild country of femininity. I may get lost from time to time, but I vow to continually work on becoming more feminine, and all the woman that I have come to be. Be it in the form of the make-up and clothes or wear (I just bought a pair of red high heels, my first I admit), or in the way I yield to a man's leadership because I understand and accept that this is his purpose.

Frankly, I'm tired and exhausted of looking like a woman, having a career like a masculine woman, wearing the pants in every situation and being a mother and father all at the same time. I long to be fragile, to nestle into your Being and to be able to surrender to you with my full confidence and trust.

It's time for us to be together and I am ready for you to come home...

Missing My Beloved

2008-11-20T18:58:00.000-08:00

Is there anyone out there who knows what it feels like to miss someone so much that at times you almost want to close your eyes, this time for one last time because your pain is so unbearable, so numbing? Have you ever had the following experience?

I miss you, but the feeling comes for a few seconds here and there at first. After a day or two the feeling seems to reside more pronounced in the solar plexus area. After another day or so it starts to radiate out towards the stomach and the heart area, growing ever bigger. It's as if there is a "black hole" in the center where my shining solar plexus usually is. The pain grows bigger until it eventually makes you feel nauseated and sick to your stomach. It's as if there is a giant elephant standing on your chest, weighing as much as the whole world and then some. The pain increases and I get headaches and a sore throat. It's as if someone is having their hands around my neck as if they're wanting to strangle me. You don't know if your tear ducts are directly linked to the Pacific Ocean, they just won't stop crying. Appetite has long gone and the longing for long, uninterrupted sleep that lasts a few weeks or months start to become predominant. Eventually you start getting short of breath or start having breathing problems all together. Anxiety sets in. A bronchitis is no suprise, a cold or a flu is not out of the ordinary either until the entire bodily system starts to shut down. Thoughts of "why did this person leave me" and "what did I do to make him go away" start to circle in a forever spin inside my head. Victim mentality starts to take over and soon, reverting to a small and weak child curled up in a corner somewhere, crying her eyes out because she doesn't understand, start to take shape. Before you know it you don't even want to leave the house. When people invite you to go out you decline because you don't feel like you want to be seen in public. You'd rather stay at home sulking and missing your beloved even more.

Perhaps you've never experienced such deep feelings? Maybe you're asking yourself why anyone would let themselves go "that far" into the hole before they climb back out into "sanity."

Have you ever welded something together or seen something that has been welded together suddenly break apart? The tear never happens where the welding was done. In other words, when the parts separate there are parts of both pieces in each other. And when the one person leaves, he or she takes a fragments and pieces from the other person with them. Neither are whole. Both feel the separation on a spiritual level. It's agony, torture, to be separated from someone you love so much.

I thought about the word "missing" and what it really means. It's one thing to say: "I'm missing my car keys" and everyone understands what that means. It's a completely different thing to say: "I'm missing my loved one." But what does it really mean?

The dictionary states that "missing" means the following:

fail to spot, overlook, let pass, fail to notice, fail to see, neglect, ignore,

fail to take, lose, pass up, let pass

It didn't quite site with me and the pain this particular word "missing" is calling forth just doesn't measure up. So I looked up the word "miss" and here is what this means:

long for, yearn for, wish for, grieve for

I liked the word "yearn" and just had to look it up. It means:

desire, long, crave, ache, hunger

It's amazing to me how missing someone can turn us into such different creatures and Beings. What body part hurts when we miss someone? According to my description above mine seems to start out in the solar plexus area and then starts to radiate out from there. Yours may be different.

What can I do to make this pain stop? What can bring back my pieces so I can be whole again? What can be done to regain full confidence again?

When someone leaves you while they are still alive then it is a conscious choice. And since we have come to be free and to experience whatever we want Life to help us create, we can choose to suffer through missing someone or to simply make a list (mental or on paper) of all the amazing moments you've been blessed with to experience with them. Then hold a "funeral" for that relationship and let the relationship go. Let the person go, wish them well and realize that he or she has fulfilled their part of the contract. It may just have been part of the overall plan.

Then sit for a moment in silence, and realize that you didn't break after all. Even if it felt like you broke into a million pieces.

All shall be well.

True Friendship

2008-11-19T12:32:00.000-08:00

Oh the comfort,

the inexpressible comfort

of feeling safe with another person.

Having neither to weigh thoughts

nor measure words,

but pouring them all right out

just as they are,

chaff and grain together---

Certain that a faithful hand

will take and sift them,

keep what is worth keeping

and with a breath of kindness

blow the rest away.

Written by Dinah Craix over a century ago.

May you find what you're looking for...or have the courage to create what you want...

Someone sent me an e-mail today in which it said: "Opportunities appear bigger when they're leaving than when they're coming." I am sad today, my love, because I'm fearful that you will let this opportunity slip by, which in turn will make so many people suffer and ache for love for even more eons. I pray for the journey of "us" to begin soon and I understand that my fear cannot be part of it, in fact, my fear is probably what's keeping you from arriving...

I ask for forgiveness, grace and mercy and the understanding to know where to place my foot next on this narrow bridge.

Rainbows, Visions and Twin Souls

2008-11-18T10:06:00.000-08:00

Visions of the Day:

I am off on my "night job" and am asked what my job duty is. "I'm an Intergalactic Rainbow Collector," I answered. I am asked if I could explain what an intergalactic rainbow collector does, and I couldn't explain it because "they wouldn't understand it anyway."

Then I shake a man's hand and immediately a rainbow is transferred from his right hand to his left hand. Then I see a vision of him standing tall with his legs closed and his face towards heaven, arms spread out to this sides, with the rainbow strong and vibrant from his one hand to his other hand, and the holographic equivalent of the upper rainbow also appearing below, to complete the circle of the rainbow.

While still shaking his hand he FEELS this "special something" going through his body and he inevitabley knows intuitively and on every level, that something special just took place, but he can't decipher it and he doesn't see what I see. He's a changed man in one instant.

Then I come to.

The corresponding question: "What decision will he make concerning us?"

Translation:

While you feel this power and you are indeed a changed man, you still are not convinced by this power and you're scared to follow it. When Jesus asked his disciples to follow him not one of them made excuses as to why they couldn't or shouldn't, not one of them delayed saying that they had to go say good bye first. They followed him knowing intuitively that this is what they had to do. It was a calling.

Similarly, you too have a calling and you either follow your calling or you'll find every excuse in the book why you're too scared to. The choice of either decision is completely with you, although the consequences will affect both of us and then ripple outward and affect our families, our communities, our cities, our countries, this world, in fact it will affect galaxies either for the better or for the worse... That's how much power your decision has.

You're a rainbow here to illuminate others, helping them complete their circles of bliss. I can help because I'm half of the rainbow, as you are half of mine. But I can't do it alone...

My blessings accompany you and I shine my rainbow to brighten your path.

Is Regret good energy or bad energy?

2008-11-18T09:35:00.000-08:00

The terms REGRET means the following:

"The pain of mind on account of something done or experienced back in the past, with a wish that it had been done differently."

"A looking back with dissatisfaction or with longing; grief; sorrow; especially, a mourning on account of the loss of some joy, advantage, or satisfaction."

Is is also possible to have regret for something that you chose NOT to experience?

Regret is feeling like an angel with only one wing...

In my life and my world I have definitely had moments where I wanted something, but my wanting was contingent upon someone else's cooperation or their desire to want the same thing. And thus some of my wants didn't come true as a result. At the time I may have had regrets because I would never know "what could have been."

Now in hindsight, of course, I see that even those holes of experiences I did want to experience, were indeed blessings in disguise.

So what does Regret have to do with finding your Twin Soul?

Is it possible to have met your Twin Soul, your one and only flame of true love, and to have let her or him go?

I find myself at an age where juvenile infatuation is not necessarily part of my life anymore. Although I love the feeling of being in love. Mostly because I quickly see through such shallow feelings and instantly transmute them into unconditional love. However, what is true and unconditional love? The kind of love you want to share with your Twin Soul?

How many times have you talked to a person in their 40s, 50s, 60s or even older, and they told you of that one special person that they knew was their Soulmate, their Twin Soul, and yet at that time they didn't recognize the power, they were lost in that feeling of childish infatuation and thus didn't recognize the true power of their connection?

How many people roam this Earth with aching hearts because they let the one person go that would have changed the entire course of their life?

I wonder how many people are out there having true regrets that they didn't follow their hearts at one point or another...

The question is, what are you to do if you have indeed let a person go?

Is there a way to get them back? Should you settle for second best? Should you wait for another life time to reunite with your Twin Soul?

We are told that if we seek with all of our hearts and all of our minds, we will find and shall have what we're looking for. It takes my entire system of desire, every atom, every molecule and neuron to work together to merging with this person. Is it hard work? Absolutely not. All it takes is patience, ease and a 100% match.

I'm calling for my 100% match - show me and communicate with me about what my next steps are in order to complete myself so I can stand before you ready for our merging.

Leadership vs. Mediocrity

2008-11-17T09:31:00.000-08:00

David Deida wrote a great book called "The Way of the Superior Man." A must-have for all men and women. I am rewriting the following paragraph to address my beloved Twin Soul.

"Beloved, I know your weaknesses better than anybody. I know where you will falter and give up. I know the degree of medicirty you will settle for. And, I know your true capacity as a full man, a man of free consciousness and love. My gift to you, because I am a good woman, is to test you with my darkest moods, over and over and over, until your consciousness is unperturbed by my feminine challenge, and you are able to pervade me with your love, just as you are here to pervade the world. In response to your fearless consciouness, I will drench your world in love and light."

When you're out with your buddies and they encourage you to go ask that woman across the room for her phone number because she's been noticing you, you might have one of the following three internal dialogues:

There are three stages a man might handle this situation:

1. "She's interested in me, I should take advantage of the situation. No one will ever find out, or I can confess it later."

2. "I should indeed take advantage of her interest in me, but I won't because I made a promise to my partner that I won't cheat on her."

3. "I am not interested in the least because I've already met my 'one and only' and have everything I need and want in her."

The first guy is what women call "a dog." He'll take any opportunity to be with a woman whose interested in him. Most women would label the second guy for a great guy because of his strength not to ask an attractive woman for her phone number. They would be ecstatic to have a man like that in their life.

I on the other hand would be disappointed that you didn't take path number three. Granted, if you had chosen path number two, you didn't ask for her phone number, because right now we're in a great space, are in love, and are having a great time. But what would have happened if we had a fight that night and were going through a rough time in our lives? I wonder if a little "side step" with a stranger would have been a nice "break" for you... The reason you wouldn't ask for her number is not because of the promise you made to me, but because you believe that you're already with your Twin Soul and nothing can compare to our union.

What I want and desire more than anything in my man is strength of character. There are way too many whimps on this planet. You can promise the world to me and keep most of your promises. But if you are keeping your promises because of me and not because of your own character, than your promises eventually will crumble like a house of cards. These promises you make will result in seeds of resentment and eventually you would feel like I'm controlling you. I have no desire in being with you if you need to make promises to me... I need to know that you do and don't do things because it's just not who you are, or because it's just who you are and how you want to live your life, no matter what anyone else says, including me.

Your word must be worth gold to you. Let your "yes" mean "yes" and your "no" mean "no." Then I can trust you, surrender into you and be all woman. Then I can let myself go into your essence, knowing that the core of you will always keep me safe and that you never compromise our love, because you never compromise your soul.

STRENGTH OF CHARACTER wins by far any other qualities I am looking for in you. It translates into leadership that I can trust and in doing so you are building our stairway into heaven.

Giving Up? Vision for the Day...

2008-11-17T08:43:00.000-08:00

What an interesting dream, question and interpretation I experienced this morning!

The Dream:

I was pregnant with a baby boy and drove to a hospital in another city. The hospital was still under construction and had no official patients. The doctor was a friend of mine and he showed me to the bed in the surgery room, where I would be giving birth to my baby boy. The baby was due, however, he had not dropped yet at all and was not even close to being born. The doctor asked me if he could give me drugs to speed up the process and I said: "Absolutely not." He asked me for a glass of water and I gladly accepted a glass of water. After drinking it, I felt dizzy and disoriented. I was alert enough to know that I was given some drug to speed up the process, and I felt betrayed and angry. Luckily and miraculously, the baby didn't react to the drugs and remained where he was, he simply refused to drop as he was just not ready. The doctor came and we talked about him looking for a place around the hospital where he could buy a nice house. However, the houses around the hospital were very expensive and he said that he would have to settle for the second most expensive place a little ways down the street. I gave him a list of other places near by that had extremely nice houses, but his heart truly was to finding something in the most expensive area, he seemed disappointed. Then I woke up.

Here is the question I asked more than a week ago, which Spirit matched up this morning:

"Should I let go of you, close off the relationship, turn my back once and for all, and is there someone else who is my one and only Twin Soul?"

I have done enough dream analysis and soul searching to know that giving birth in any dream is always a good omen (unless it's giving birth to something not of the light). My boy didn't want to be rushed, even though the due date has arrived, which can be likened to the stars having aligned to you being born, you had the final say-so and you were simply not ready (it showed in the fact that you hadn't dropped yet). Although you hadn't dropped, I still went to the hospital because I wanted you to be born now. I wanted to force you... I want my Twin Soul to be with me now, I am impatient. And although I didn't accept the drugs to speed up the process (which could be likened to me forcing the issue), I did drink the water, which contained a form of drug to speed up the process. I have to accept that somehow my behavior acts like an ultimatum to you, and I'm sorry. Thank God the baby is wise enough to know that he is not ready and for not being forced to be born when in reality he is not ready yet. In other words, my Twin Soul is just not quite ready yet to be in my life in the real flesh, even though ironically speaking you live inside of me and get nurturing from me from within, without a doubt. You still have your own growth to complete before you can be in my life in the flesh.

Doctors in dreams very often represent the God Self within us, the masculine power that has the scalpel to make a difference in someone's life, to save a life, to perform surgery on our soul, so we can live. This doctor was a friend of mine, of course, God is my best friend. I'm at a loss to understand what it means that the doctor gave me water with drugs in it to speed up the process. Perhaps it's my subconscious way of manipulating God's eternal wisdom to bringing this Twin Soul into my experience now? Perhaps it means that I'm shoving God out of the driver seat, telling him that he is working too slow here, "move over, I can do this faster." Forgive me.

The hospital was still under construction, it's a building where people will be saved and gain new hope. My life with my Twin Soul will serve humanity to gain new hope for their lives, where they get a new lease on their love life. In order for this hospital to finish, I need to first give birth to this baby boy. In other words, I can't force my Twin Soul to enter my life healthy, vibrant and full of life, unless he is truly ready, only then can we make a difference in people's lives. Our tree is life-giving, shade-giving, a resting place, for humanity. Our roots need to be strong, solid and intertwined.

My friend feels as though he needs to settle for second best as far as his life is concerned. I often wonder if I have to settle for second best unless you see that you need to be born into our existence. I am your half, I need you to complete the existence of the yin-yang in us and for the world, the figure 8 that runs in a forever loop of eternity and abundance. Without you the hospital will never be finished, because I can't do it on my own.

I won't settle for second best. I want the very best, the whole of the whole, the seed within the yin-yang, I want it all. I am waiting patiently until you're ready to be born. And I vow not to rush you but to let you choose your own time of birth. And when you do, you will find me. And I thank the infinite wisdom to bring forth patience from within, so I can hold your space...

From my own memory of being born, I was born 10 days late, I remember thinking: "I'm not going through there!" It was painful being born, it was dark, unknown and I didn't want to give up the comfortable, the known. So I want to accompany you through your birthing process, by telling you that there is a whole new world waiting for you once you decide to take the plunge and be born. Awaken and take the journey, it's all worth it my love.

Questions, Visions and Answers

2008-11-16T19:47:00.000-08:00

I have started a different approach to getting my questions answered. I am fascinated at the accuracy and in-depth answers I receive simply writing down a question, folding up the piece of paper and putting it in an envelope. I also write down visions I receive, during my prayers and meditations. Days later, long after I have forgotten the question, I mediate after I read one of my short visions and then pick the envelope that shows the same callibration of frequency. I am floored, and yet not, to get so much insight to my questions.

Today I meditated when the following scene emerged from within:

You: "Will you move to Oregon with me?"

Me: "I would be honored to; by your side is where my home is."

After I told my girlfriend about my move here is her reaction: "Are you crazy!? Don't you have your own life."

Me: "I have a life as long as I am with him, no matter where that is."

Then I turned to you and said: "You are my family."

Here is the question I picked: "Should I wait for you or move on?"

Suddenly a scene flashed in front of my eyes, when "the blue man" in "The 5 people you meet in heaven" says to Eddie: "Strangers are family you simply haven't met yet."

I realized that you are my family because you are my Twin Soul. Running from you is like running from God. No matter where I run to, you'll be right there. Family will always be family, even if I decide not to talk to you for the rest of my family, the family ties remain through life times, centuries, eons, eternity. Sometimes it takes a holiday to bring family members back together.

I also realized from this vision that dedication and surrender are at the core of my desire. I understand the depth of our relationship and the task at hand. My home is by your side, no matter where you move us to. You are my leader and I rely on your great leadership.

Pray for us, beloved. And don't delay.

Why Are You Not Here?

2008-11-16T19:40:00.000-08:00

It's evening time. I look at my bed. I look over at your side, the empty place that is awaiting your presence. Why are you not here tonight? You know where to find me. Where are you tonight? Whom are you with? Envisioning you here with me is so natural, so easy - I am calling you home. It's time now...

I find myself praying more than I have in the past, putting out my voice so it can reach you and echo back to me. Pray with me, my beloved. Pray for our reunion at this time. The world is waiting for our merging. You know the scientific and chemical happenings when Twin Souls reunite...it's powerful beyond measure. It's time to come home.

Twin Souls and Mirrors

2008-11-16T17:29:00.000-08:00

I teach a class to women during which we play a game. They have approximately 10 important items to bid on. Some of these items are things like world peace, finding a steady-paying job, a great wardrobe, enjoying great health for the entire family, unlimited wealth, being in a happy relationship with their beloved, and so on. There are no rules to the game. In other words, they can join forces with other women, they can borrow from the bank, etc. The bidding starts at $5 per item and increases by $5 for each higher bid. They are given a list of all the items they can bid on ahead of time, so they can study each item and allocate what they might want to bid on.

I have taught this class several times (always to women) and it never fails that the winning item is always one and the same: being in a happy relationship with their beloved.

What was different in this last class was that only two women had enough money to pay for the final bidding amount, but all of them wanted this item more than anything. The two women who could pay for the item offered all of the other women to split the final bidding amount, so they each could have a happy relationship with their beloved. It was simply amazing!

I believe that every human being knows intuitively, subconsciously, spiritually, etherically, and whatever else you want to call the unseen realms, that to reunite with this Twin Soul is a most important goal, a calling from within, it's a going-home event that is of utmost importance to each and every one of us.

Of course, in reality it's not the Twin Soul that I am really needing, as much as he serves as my mirror, reflecting back to me the very Self of me, so that I can truly be whole and "go home" and be one with my God Self. And I in turn can do the same for him. We are twins, in the most literal, spiritual sense.

On a website I found this: "It would seem that this desire for oneness must be the foundation upon which all relationships are built. Male-female unions have come into being and have fallen apart for thousands of years. However, if a deep, spiritual union with our Source can be established and maintained, the chances for lasting joy and fulfillment becomes more and more of a possibility. It also seems to make more sense that our relationships should be based upon spiritual principals rather than man made religious dogmas which can bring so much fear and guilt into people's lives.

When we finally " wake up" and begin the journey Home to our Source, no longer needing experiences and feelings at the Earth's level of existence, corresponding twins will reunite once again. Male and female essence will blend into in one form, perfectly balanced, totally spiritual, with unconditional love for themselves and others. From that point forward they will remain as one for eternity as they coalesce with other reunited twins to recreate the soul groups they separated from a long time ago. Ultimately, all of us will reunite as the "original One."

How I long for this reunion! How I long to go home and be at rest, at peace, to surrender and to nestle into my beloved's soul where time and space truly disappear...

The Division of our Souls

2008-11-15T10:17:00.000-08:00

On my journey to really wrap my soul around this joyous reunion, which lies ahead of me in the near future, I have come across some amazing material, insights, intuitive hits, dreams, visions and the "other side" continues to shower me with symbols of all kinds, to guide me gently, yet unmistakeably, towards my Twin Soul.

As I am understanding magnets and our magnetic forces of this Universe, I liken the joining with my Twin Soul to be inevitable, because we too are like magnets who were divided into two separate magnetic pieces, eons ago. Just like there are masculine and femininate polarities of everything that exists, the feminine exists within the masculine and the masculine exists within the feminine. In essence, as a woman I can never escape the masculine, it's part of who I am. Similarly, my Twin Soul's masculine essence has been retained in me and serves as a magnet, to calling him home.

When we meet, you will recognize yourself in me. And I will recognize my own Self in you. It's like a drowning in your eyes, into your soul.

So while I am roaming this earthly life on this planet, seemingly appearing "incomplete," I realize that I have to be complete and whole as the whole feminine part in order to be able to join with my whole masculine Twin Soul. If I am imcomplete, the joining won't take place. If I am looking to him to complete me, the joining won't take place. It's as if Hydrogen is mixing with a mixture of Oxygen and Iodine - it simply won't be able to create water - only PURE Hydrogen and Oxygen will do this part. Does this mean I have to be perfect before I can meet my guy? Absolutely not.

It does mean, however, that I have to be balanced in my masculine and feminine parts, as does he. Only when we are balanced and whole within ourselves, will our merging have the "home coming" effect that it is intended to be.

I realize that every powerful deed and outcome, no matter the task at hand, always is initiated with a commitment and intention, backed by ACTION. Reuniting with my Twin Soul can only happen if I am dedicated to my spiritual nature and through my own inner transformation that is so profound that it will affect the deepst part of my being as well as those around me.

The more I grow internally, spiritually, evolutionarily (if that is even a word), the more my soul craves to be united and completed with my Twin Soul. It's as if I knew that I have a purpose that can only be fully completed with him in the physical picture. It's like a doctor who walks into the surgery room but he's missing all of his tools and equipment. He knows he needs to do surgery on this patient, but he can't because he's missing the tools. In a similar way I feel like I have a job to complete but I am unable to without the presence and power of my beloved Twin Soul. I'm still in medical school and not allowed yet to be working with real scalpels...

Our souls were separated long ago and the essence of my soul and his soul know that the rejoining is incomplete as of yet, yet inevitable. It's part of the big divine plan. I believe that every human soul recognizes this joining, this calling, this need for merging - no matter how much it also terrifies us out at the same time. The search for our true beloved is like our first intimacy, initiated at the beginning of time, when we were first split into two parts, to realize the illusion called life, in which we live in today. Our entire goal is to reunite with our one and only light source, God, or whatever people call it. Part of this reunion is to merge back with our original Self, our Twin Soul.

I am longing to have you stand before me, in the flesh, in your 4-layered body suit, in all your glory, so we can continue this earthly journey together. So much work to do, so much love to spread, so much unity and light to provide...

Appreciation of the Day

2008-11-13T12:43:00.000-08:00

My dear Beloved, as I am watching nature and the still instinctual animals of our planet, I realize that the concept of give-and-take is completely absent. It simply doesn't exist. What does exist, however, is a give-and-regive energy that keeps the circle of abundance going on and on. Rain falling from the sky never gets rejected by the soil, but instead is received and absorbed with gratitude. Out of the overflowing of this receiving, the soil has no choice but to give the gift back to the skies in form of dew, clouds, and fog. And the skies gratefully accept this beautiful and magnificant gift, only so it too can overflow with the gift itself by converting it into rain once again so it can be given back to the soil. And so the circle goes on and on. It's a circle of giving. And expectations are nowhere to be found within this sacred concept of nature.

Love is the only form of energy that cannot be received. It can only be given. And only in the GIVING is our love blessed with the immediate feeling of having received an amazing gift.

To give is truly a blissful state to be in. How I wish to approach my union with you in this way.

Yet how often do I remember someone wanting to do something nice for me and how I would simply squash the gift by saying: "Oh, you shouldn't have!"

The soil never closes its arms to the skies by saying: "Oh, you shouldn't give me this precious gift of rain today!"

And yet we do this to people all the time. And oh, how I apologize to all whose gifts I have ever "clipped off."

What I appreciate about you, my Beloved, is all that you willingly do for me and us as a union. Thank you for going the extra mile to come see me, for driving long hours while being tired, because being with me is the most important thing to you. Thank you for giving so unconditionally of yourself and for allowing me to receive your amazing gifts, and holding my space if ever I falter and reject them, when in fact I'm simply overwhelmed with your giving. Thank you for your patience, for your guidance and for your unconditional love and leadership to being the one to bringing the sun's light to this relationship.

And I await you with reverance...

Edgar Cayce on Twin Souls

2008-11-13T12:11:00.000-08:00

Edgar Cayce, who was also known as the wonderful "sleeping prophet," spoke about Twin Souls. He explained how in the beginning the "male and female were as in one." In his historical description of Atlantis, Cayce says that as long as several hundred thousands of years ago ... "there lived in this land of Atlantis one Amillius, who had first noted the separations of the beings as inhabited that portion of the earth's sphere or plane of these peoples, into male and female as separate entities or individuals."

I realize that every time I drive at night, the headlights on my car seem to point towards each other somewhere in the near distance, and so creating a light much brighter than if there were two individual lights on the road ahead of me. I don't seem to get twice as much light with two headlights, I seem to get eight times as much than if I only used one. The joining with my Twin Soul creates that same opportunity for merged power. Thus people who are with their right partners achieve so much more than if they were alone or with their wrong partners.

The more I know about Twin Souls the more I am able to "tap into" his spirit and soul. How blessed I feel, how blessed I am, to know that he exists in this life time of mine so we can be reunited again.

I imagine us doing whatever it takes to bloom our relationship and union. Yes, we're in these earthly, 4-layered body suits and thus have some physical limitations. However, the spiritual limitations are completely removed because in us the universal life force of creation is manifest.

How magnificant!

The Sufis on Twin Souls

2008-11-12T11:35:00.000-08:00

Spiritual writings from the Sufis 800 years ago state:

"Out of the original unity of being there is a fragmentation and dispersal of beings, the last stage being the splitting of one soul into two. And consequently, love is the search by each half for the other half on earth or in heaven... As twin souls are so alike to begin with, it seems necessary for them to go their separate ways before they can complete each other. Identity and complementarity are the two driving forces and axes of love... For the complete being there must be a blending of the two."

Again I am reminded once again of hydrogen and oxygen. Both are gases. Yet when combined they void each other out willingly for the great good: to become life giving and life sustaining water.

I used to scoff at the thought of having to give up a piece of myself in order to be in a relationship. The idea of compromising or worse even - of sacraficing - seemed illogical to me. And the term "voiding myself" certainly sounds like "forgetting about myself," nullifying myself," "forsaking myself." When in fact it only seems like a oxymoron, a contradiction in its literal sense. In fact the exact opposite becomes true. In order words, if I "lose" myself for the sake of being united with my Twin Soul, I "gain" heaven and bliss instead.

We have all heard things like: "In order for a seed to produce it must fall to the ground and die." "And the two shall become one." And "what God has mended no man shall separate."

I am realizing that no matter how hard we try, water will never become gasous again. It can take on different forms, however, and adjust to and create new conditions. In form of steam, dew, fog, ice and so on. Similarly, my relationship with my Twin Soul will enable me so much more than if I remained on my own. The choice is clear: Find my Twin Soul as soon as possible.

November Topic: What are Twin Souls?

2008-11-12T11:26:00.000-08:00

I am so engulfed in getting a good grasp on the term "Twin Souls," that I decided to dedicate the entire month of November to writing about it. If I want to buy a house, I first must know what exactly I want. Do I want a small house or a big house? A 2-story house or a 1-story house? Hardwood floors or carpet? Views, no views? With my clear picture in hand I can go to the realtor and tell him or her what exactly I want. Similarly, with a clear picture of who I am (first and foremost) and then knowing that my Twin Soul is my energetic idential Twin, I will go out into the world looking for him, knowing exactly what I'm looking for. Guess work and "what ifs" and "maybes" and "could he be the one" are immediately eliminated. And the path is made straight.

The more I read and meditate, the more I am feeling connected to my Love. Having said that, I pray and intend to make my call for "the one" a powerful echo, which undoubtedly is on its way to returning to me...

Watch a Special Movie I made for my Love

2008-11-12T09:52:00.000-08:00

Ah, I figured out how to imbed our movie into this post, rather than sending you away. So here it goes again...

Very rarely do two people find each other, yet when they do, entire galaxies are shaken up...This is a true love story. Just when life is over and flashes by you one more time, you'll realize that all that mattered was love and kindness. So when watching this video of this true story, imagine your own journey of love to be just as significant and inspirational (never settle for less than what you truly deserve). And the Universe shall deliver you just that: True and Unconditional Love.

Plato on Twin Souls

2008-11-11T19:29:00.000-08:00

Although I am writing this blog as form of a diary and expression to my Beloved, I'm certain that as I am calling out to finding my One and Only, others will be drawn to this site in search of the same. Never before in history have we as a combined human soul been searching to "go home" or "be at home" with that special someone. Not just anyone, the One and Only one who seems to "complete" us and transform us into something brand new, like hydrogen and oxygen together create our life-giving, life-sustaining water.

The twin-soul concept is not new.

Plato described it 2,500 years ago: " ... and when one of them meets the other half, the actual half of himself, the pair are lost in an amazement of love and friendship and intimacy and one will not be out of the other's sight even for a moment... If Hephaestus, son of Zeus, were to ask the pair; 'do you desire to be wholly one, always day and night to be in one another's company? For if this is what you desire, I am ready to melt you into one and let you grow together, so that being two you shall become one, and after your death in the world beyond you will still be one departed soul instead of two — I ask whether this is what you lovingly desire?' — and there is not a man or woman of them who, when they heard the proposal, would not acknowledge that this melting into one another, this becoming one instead of two, was the very expression of their ancient need. And the reason is that human nature was original one and we were a whole, and the desire and pursuit of the whole is called love."

Plato is not the only individual who has given us insights into twin soul relationships. There are many others, such as the Sufis, Edgar Cayce, the list goes on.

The question I have to ask myself is this: "Would I rather remain a single drop of water, independent and proud to be dripping off a leaf while giving life to a little plant or would my talents be used better if I merged into the brooke, the stream, the river, the lake, and eventually unite with the big sea?"

Am I scared to lose myself if I melt with my other half and together we merge into the big sea (our light source) and have all that support? Or would I rather remain a single, little drop, alone yet independent? Where is the balance to be whole within myself, yet understanding the calling that there is so much more power when together we melt into one?

I am not scared at all. In fact I am longing and striving and intending to get to the big sea rather sooner than later. I realize that merging with my other half will multiply my lonely power by getting the "boulder rolling" much faster and with a lot more power.

I am ready for you, Beloved.

What Is a Twin Soul?

2008-11-11T12:15:00.000-08:00

Meeting the "other half of your soul" is generally so life changing and profound that this question is unnecessary.... you just know. Twin souls will both recognize this extraordinary bond, whether they are evolved and whole enough to acknowledge and act upon it is another thing. Meeting with your twin soul brings about an internal spiritual revolution, a deeper connection and understanding of the Divine and the Universal Oneness, this is the greatest gift of knowing your twin. Twin soul love is not to be confused with an obsessive/compulsive disorder, it's not a desire to "possess" another, but truly a challenge to love unconditionally and without expectation, to be whole and complete within yourself before joining with the other whole and complete side of your soul. The longing and desire to be with your twin soul is intense, but through growth and perception can be seen as the greater longing to join with the Divine, and that is the true lesson, you are two halves of a much greater whole.

When you meet your twin, there will be no "game-playing" or manipulation, you will have the need to be transparently honest in your relationship and communication with one another. If there is karma from past lives to work out between you, it will be apparent and consciously worked out. Meeting your twin soul challenges you to grow spiritually, heal mentally, emotionally, physically, and to see beyond time, ego, and physical limitations. You will be driven with the desire to be the best manifestation of your soul on earth. This is not a relationship of hearts and flowers, but one that will be tested in fire and will endure beyond time and space.
Then, during reunion, the essence of one simply flows into the essence of the other to create the completeness. There is no effort involved.

It is also impossible for twin souls to remain separated on any kind of permanent basis. When in relationship, they may continue to have conflicts. However, they will be driven to resolve these conflicts (and any past karma) as quickly as possible. Nothing is left unsaid. Nothing is left to chance. Assumptions never enter their minds. All is out in the open. Neither sits, pouts and wonders who will make the first move at "making up." There are no games. There is no pretending. There is no deception. There is no fear of reprisal because unconditional love is the foundation upon which their relationship has been built. In essence, they can just be themselves. And as each conflict resolves, the bond of love between them takes on renewed meaning and strength. What incredible freedom! Such is the nature of this very divine and profound union.

How will you know you have met your twin?

· Chances are you've met through a set of unusual circumstances... totally unplanned and unexpected
· There is an instantaneous feeling that you have known the other before
· You felt an immediate and deep connection for one another
· There is an electrifying feeling between the two of you that words cannot describe
· The relationship is immediate... as though no time had been lost since you were last together
· It feels as though you had never lived before the reunion occurred
· You feel a deep sense of unity that you've have never known before
· It brings on feelings you never thought possible
· The two of you are inseparable
· When you look into each other's eyes time and space have no meaning
· There are no barriers between the two of you... the relationship is a totally open one
· Your conversations seem to go on forever
· The two of you have a strong urge to serve humanity in a deep and meaningful way
· You give to the other and never think of receiving in return
· There is a special sacredness to your relationship that transcends anything you've ever experienced before
· You still have karma with your twin (from previous lives) but the two of you resolve it all with total forgiveness and unconditional love
· Neither one of you are dependent on the other for your sense of self
· There is a real feeling of unlimitedness to your feelings... you have a strong sense of eternity
· Your feelings for each other are very spiritual
· There are no restrictions within the relationship... all is freedom without the need for ownership or control
· The two of you know without doubt that you have been brought together for a reason
· You do not compete with one another nor do you pretend to be other than who you are
· In spite of your sameness there is no doubt you feel a sense of completion through the other
· Trust, patience, acceptance of each other's weaknesses happen automatically
· There is a great sense of purpose and meaning to the relationship
· Your sexuality with one another is a sacred act that celebrates the unconditional love you have for one another
· When you look into the other's eyes you see yourself
· You experience a sense of completeness that is without comparison

Holding our space my Beloved...